Untrusting Mind

My world has become so cold and intense inside, wanting but not wanting to let you in.

Hitting a mental wall, can’t even understand where these thoughts are conspiring from.

I’m reaching out, though my untrusting mind doesn’t want to receive your help, those demons inside my brain telling me you only want to help to receive something yourself.

It’s so cold and isolating in my world,

My thoughts are my only friends.

Sure, maybe you feel like we have been getting close.

But my mind doesn’t trust, everything usually ends in some type of bust.

My thoughts telling me the worse, its like one tragic concurring curse.

I don’t want to live in this world alone, but my mind won’t allow you in.

So pack another bowl, try to escape these thoughts, don’t even feel at home in this house anymore.

I’m not ready to let hang my life hang up on a shelve,

So God, please send some help, my mind isn’t letting it ask for itself.

It’s so cold and isolating in my world,

My thoughts are my only friends.

Sure, maybe you feel like we have been getting close.

But my mind doesn’t trust, everything usually ends in some type of bust.

My thoughts telling me the worse, its like one tragic concurring curse.

I feel like I can breakdown at any moment, but the fight is still inside.

Putting this piece down, the pain hurts but it makes me feel alive.

Cloud nine has been a constant escape to numb the emotions and feelings,

Where did I let my time go?

It’s so cold and isolating in my world,

My thoughts are my only friends.

Sure, maybe you feel like we have been getting close.

But my mind doesn’t trust, everything usually ends in some type of bust.

My thoughts telling me the worse, its like one tragic concurring curse.

So please send some help, I want to escape my internal nightmare.