Real Love

I always wondered if I would experience a One True Love. As a younger man, I believed I found my One True Love, only to be hit in the face with the reality that I had not found it. Many years have passed and I now believe that True Love, may not exist for me, however I feel fortunate to have experienced Real Love.

It is strange how life's twists and turns take us from what we thought our lives would be to what they really are. Careers, failed relationships, and the loss of friends, continuoulsy push us into different directions. For me, I long for someone I can not have. My life's turns have put me in a place that seems almost impossible to get out of. How can I break the trust of the people that rely on me so that I may have a shot at the happiness I have longed for? Why can't I just be happy with what I have and who I am with?

I have always believed, things happen for a reason, although we may not know what those reasons are and may never know. I have a special someone in my life. Someone that I think of constantly. We have daily conversations but rarely see each other. It is nice to know there is someone that misses me, and someone that is genuinely happy when they hear my voice, or read my words. We both have seperate lives and commitments but there is an understanding and a longing for each other. Somehow, I am able to go to work, go home, keep my responsibilities, but in my heart, and in my mind, I am with the one person that melts me with a smile. Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can smell her hair and feel her against me. I think the longing, pain, happiness, and comfort, is what Real Love is supposed to feel like. With that love, there is a different love I have for those I take care of. Even though I can not be with the one that is in my heart, I am still experiencing love. I guess that all lends to the quagmire of what Love really is.