Why...

Why do I write?

Writing is the only way I can show how vulnerable I am. Because when I live my life, sharing my thoughts and emotions makes no sense when I try to speak or act. I always end up hiding my flaws, I try to show myself as the most optimistic, most put together, most perfect version of myself. All that glitter is washed away in writing...writing is the most genuine way I am able to get my dark thoughts out of my head before they consume me...I write to convince myself that it's okay to be this broken...at least, I'm trying to convince myself that it's okay.Without writing...I don't know how else I would be able accept my imperfections.

I don't think there's anything else I can really give to the world. My writing is the one thing that only I can do...only I can create and call my own. Otherwise I feel so small and it feels like I can't do anything in this giant universe. It sounds so pathetic and cliche, I know...but I think I need to write to feel like my life has a hint of a purpose. Like I'm not just waking up and following the same set of routines every day for the rest of my life.

I write, because if my crazy thoughts can reach out and help anyone, then it's worth it. If my writing makes your day a little better, it's worth it. If it makes you see something you haven't seen before or realize something you never thought about, it's worth it. Even if it is just one person who ends up reading it. I don't need to go big, I don't need to get famous. I just hope I can make you feel something when you read my words...because life can feel robotic and lifeless sometimes.

I write about brokenness, about the flaws in the world, to (hopefully) show that we are all broken...but it's a beautiful kind of broken that humanity shares in together...being broken is what defines us and no one is alone in feeling broken on the inside...I hope my writing can capture this idea even a little bit.

So...I know it's a long confession...but this is why I write.