J.

Another sip of tea

Better late than ever, across the room you glanced at me

Caught me by surprise how you chose to let us die

Dealing with a heart that I didn't break

Every day is painful, it feels like a never ending war

Furocious in madness that's completed with empty mornings of sadness

Giving all of me, down to the last dust of bone

Healing to replenish where love once lived

I know it's a lesson learned, I was burned but at some point we have to forgive

Just the very thought of you grows fire inside of me

Killing me with no kindess but the absence of your whole being

Loving you was the bravest thing I did even If I knew I would spill out all of me

Melting the pot of love, hurt, defeat and cheat

Nothing compares to the night at 4am when I listened to your heartbeat

Over every painful exchange, every tear I've shared with God

Putting myself first to create self love and beating the odds

Quiet nights alone humble me in sickening ways of me falling asleep saying your name

Relentless torture to my soul when I think about how she gets to feel you

Sitting in the cafe where it all once made sense and our hearts grew

Tonight is the last time I will need you

Under all of this pain, happiness will burst free

Venting out smoke from past trauma that still lingers for a place to go

Waiting for you to accept your mistakes and let go

Xenons of lust suffocates me and leaves me wicked and binding

You weere the greatest heartache to interrupt my sanity

Zipped up my bag of bones and shredded flesh, I loved every second of you, we were the best.