Alright

Trembling, looking at myself,

This mirror must be broken

I am just fine

All I ever need is another line

I know that I hurt her

And I destroyed him

then I married a guy after 21 days

The first couple years is all a haze

But when I saw your little face

How could there have been any grace?

I wasn’t good enough to be mom

I felt better off if you were alone

The months that went by,

the pills that stopped getting me high,

All I could do was wonder why

I hated myself so much that

I needed to die

I will never forget that night

A 40 ounce at my side

A bottle of anti-depressants

A death that just wasn’t

I stared at the sky,

I begged for a reprieve

On the lawn of a church

I began to percieve

Crawling because I couldn’t walk

Drooling because I couldn’t talk

If it weren’t for 911

I think I’d have already passed on

How could I have done this

His father cried

What would your children have done

If you had died...

But something inevitably did die

That hate that I had since birth

The disgust towards my own life,

My own limiting self worth

And now it is alright