Hey, little Paul

Hey Little Paul, don’t be freaked out

This is future Paul. Big you;

and I want to tell you about

some stuff that you may want to know.

But you may not.

I’ll leave that up to you.

If you stop reading now you live a life.

You’ll live it hard and fast and you

will have a thousand stories

for the kids you never had.

Your life will be a fantasy.

Until you grow up, that's true.

You’ll not go to university, and choose cash

by going into a string of shallow jobs

that fund a decadent lifestyle.

You’ll follow your heart dear Paul,

you’ll party hearty and be oh so cool.

But then you’ll realise something’s odd.

While you chased fun, others did not

and they left you to carry on.

While you slept with all the beauties,

bought and sold houses that made fortunes

they all set up their futures, had kids,

and older and way less cool, they made a bomb.

So Little Paul, if that’s what you want

Then stop your reading now, right?

Otherwise, if you want a future paved in gold

bricks and safety, then read the hell on

for I have healthy hindsight to give.

I impart to you over 40 years of plight.

Buy that house, keep it, then buy all the rest.

As the women leave you, sort paperwork and above

all never sell those houses. You’ll make a million quid.

When you bore so easily, with each new woman,

when you see how shallow you are with their beauty;

be sensible. Make do. Marry someone you don’t love.

In that job you hate, just you grin and bear it.

Stay there always, don’t follow your dreams

they’re laced with risk, may never work out.

Toil hard, strive long, screw that work-life balance.

When you’re in your 40s, looking 60, life will seem

far safer and normal. Just like everyone else has been.

So be a good boy, Little Paul

Grow up into a safer, sensible being.

Follow rules, don't drink or smoke,

eat healthy, work out, never get in debt.

I'm joking, do it all, do everything and more besides.

Fuck, laugh and live, for you’re dead by Spring.