Never got the chance...

Grandpa!

I never got the chance to tell you how much I loved and still love you. The reason I was never around when you were still alive is because I knew you wouldn't recognize me and I would end up crying alone in the bathroom. I wanted to tell you that, I need you right now more than ever! I need you to hug me and talk to me, tell me that everything is going to be ok, that I'm not alone, that you will be here to help me! But all I have to say is...the things I never got the chance to tell you...well...I remember those beautiful days when I was at your house with cousins and grandma was making our favorite food but not only one..she liked to cook more than one meal so everyone would be happy! But on that table I was always sitting next to you cause

A) I was the small one

B) I wanted to be next to you!

You were always making jokes and you were actually laughing with what I was saying and thank you for that. And after lunch how can I forget that you were sitting with us and you were playing with us...I may don't remember nothing from my past, how i was as a kid but this one is one I will never forget! Cause this one is my favourite! You wanna know why? Cause it was the last time I saw you smiling and laughing...after the accident you had and had to stay in bed for the rest of your life and that you couldn't talk because of the many strokes you had I cried a lot. When I was around the house to visit you and see you, it was hard day by day,week after week, and that's when I stopped being around, knowing I shouldn't stop. So I was coming to visit once a week or month and you seemed to forget me and I don't blame you for that but only me! I was crying 24/7 without letting anyone see me and when one day I heard the bad news?! I regret for the times I missed being around you! And I cried the hell out of me...You are not here now but I want you to know that I kept a pair of your pjs...just to feel you around me when I'll be sad or feeling like I'm going down into a depression!

I'm sorry for anything I may did and I love you till we meet again!