Dire Straights

What if straight were the minority? That is a profound question, and I'll be upfront when I tell you it took some actual pondering on my part to come up with even half an answer. Let's get the first part out of the way so you can determine whether you want to read further or not.

I'm a straight white male who hasn't experienced every advantage, but I have been given more than most. I was raised in the bible belt, Oklahoma, to be specific. Football, cattle, and baptists. So I know all the hellfire and brimstone teachings, particularly the ones regarding homosexuality. These teachings stand out so vividly in my mind as the result of an extra-religious uncle who would constantly rant and rave on the subject to not just me but his wife and three kids. As it turns out, my uncle was overcompensating.

He was super gay the entire time, and if I'm honest, I liked him way more after he came out of the closet. And lucky for my uncle, I had ignored all his teachings. My rejection of his "lessons" was due to a pair of gay uncles on my dad's side. Uncle Steve and Uncle Jim. A couple of super cool, well-kempt, great-smelling dude's. I don't know what kind of cologne those guys spritzed on, but they didn't skimp on cost.

So before I make this anymore about me, and keeping my background in mind, I'd answer a question with a series of questions. Here we go.

Exactly how reversed would our current roles be in the world? Would it be the exact polar opposite regarding everyone's sexuality? In that world, would I be an 8-year-old gay kid sitting in the backseat of the car while one of my mom's awkwardly explained why my Aunt Stephanie and Uncle Jim sometimes kiss and hold hands around me?

Would I have a secretly straight uncle constantly espousing hateful views about his own sexuality? Would I be gay or straight in that world? Would any LGTBQ+ people still reading be straight? In that universe, would there be people holding signs in the street telling me I'm going to hell for being a straight person? Camp's to convert me from my straight ways?

I could go on and on, banging my head off a wall with these questions, but I won't. There are too many variables—for me at least—to even guess as to what society, and ultimately, the world would look like. The planet wouldn't be overpopulated, so maybe global warming wouldn't be a thing. Beyond that, I don't know how things would be. But there is one thing I would hope for that version of me in that world.

I would hope that in that world, I had the same influences I had in this one. People to teach me we don't hate just because someone is different and that I'm not better than any other sexuality or nationality. As an adult, I am far from perfect, but I can proudly say I'm not a hateful asshole. A regular, run-of-the-mill asshole? Yes. A hateful one? No. Regardless of the variables, I would hope I could say the same about myself in that world.