....

Even though i wear a smile, it never really passes my cheeks and touche my eyes. it lingers on my painful firm lips as i whisper i am okay. i care way more about the next person than i do myself. i advice them on how to deal with anxiety and depression yet some days i cannot seem to lift my own heavy limps out of bed, as negative thoughts coarse through my head telling me that i am not worth it. that i am useless. that i am not going to make it. yet somehow i force a slice of bread down my throat and coffee all in the believe that maybe someone out there may need my help. but how can i help everyone else but myself, they ask. the answer is bitter sweet. yet it drips from my lips with ease as i whisper. because they all so consumed by their own problems they barely notice mine. they dont look further then the plastered smile on my face nore do they ear the trembling of my voice as i speak. but most importantly they never ask how i am so good at advising others.