Hate

I hate this world I am forced to call home. I hate this body I am forced to be in. I hate the fact I have to be called a failure, that I have to suck it up daily because I cannot do basic human functions. Walking, standing, sitting and rising so many times to the point my entire body aches. People don’t see me, they see my disabilities. The fact I can’t run, walk, stand and do basic human functions. I have lost so many opportunities to This fact. When I’m in a wheelchair And stand up people assume I’m faking it, or I don’t need it. They see a perfectly normal person who’s lazy, insincere and inconsiderate. im not that person. I want to be normal, and I want to be good. I want to be happy. ive never been happy. I’ve never been truly happy. There’s always been something bothering me or something on my mind. What does happy even feel like? I don’t remember. I’m forced to share a body with othrrs, andnother disabilty I am forced to cope with. I can’t begin To fathom how people without mental health or physical disabilities live. I have not known a day of my life where I was not in pain, mental or physical. That fact alone hurts. I’m cursed. i hate this. I hate being here.may I add, the Fact that I am given this set of cards since birth accumulates, where I cannot breathe. I am stuck under the water with no return to the surface. no matter how much I wrotw, I will never escape my thoughts. I will never escape the belifs chasing me and corropting me.