Accusations

I'm fourteen and in my room,

Trying to deal with something not new,

An emotion that I've felt so long,

I can't remember when it was gone.

Years ago,

I tried to explain,

The pain and havoc,

Inside my brain.

But, you turned your back on me,

Locked me in a cell,

And threw away the key.

You told me to let it go,

To suck it up,

Buttercup.

But I can't,

And I haven't ever,

Forgotten the pain those words have caused.

Those words that torment my mind daily,

Those words that so easily,

Imprison me.

But now I'm older,

And I understand,

You were just as afraid as I am.

And now you think you know,

My pain and sorrow,

And how I've come to grow,

And learn to hide my tears.

But you don't know the half of it,

You can't see inside my mind,

And if you could,

You'd be horrified,

By the terrible pain you will find.

But you'll never know,

And you'll never see,

How your words and actions,

Will never leave me.

I'll always remember,

Those painful words,

Those harsh cold shoulders,

And silent fights.

You say I locked myself up,

But you were the one holding the key,

And as you stood there in the distance,

I think you were laughing at me.

But now I'm older,

And I know who I am,

And you're going to regret,

Telling me your plans.

Because now I hold the key,

To my own prison cell,

And despite my insecurity,

I will not be felled.