Kill me slowly

You knew you had me in your grasp. You knew I was right in the palm of your hand, you had me right where you wanted me. You tore a hole in me but I was too delighted by your touch to push you away. You were always hurting me but my brain was the only one that recognized it.

Pick me up, take me away, throw me back on the streets just as long as you come back when you need me. Pathetic, that's what it is. Me needing you and you loving it. I'd never admit it, not to myself or you, that if you had my blood on your hands I'd wash them for you. Ignorance is bliss, ignorance is safety. When you hold me in your arms and I feel the cold metal slicing my back I will only hold you and cry. I don't love the pain, I don't love the fights and long nights. I love you. I love the look it you eyes when you get excited, how you can't stop talking when you're embarrassed, I love every part of you that you try to cover up.

But I hate that I love you. If I love you, then how am I supposed to love myself? Being with you is killing me, my only request is that you do it slowly. My only wish is that I can drown in your eyes one last time before closing mine forever.

I hate you! I hate you so much, but I love you double that. I have o one but myself to blame for it.