a fatal fantasy/phantom.
you're a darling in a dress who likes dancing with the devil
you wait for the witches and appease the apparitions
their incantations are your strongest temptation
the way they tease you and tell you how good you are
you chase the mirage and wonder why you weren't rewarded
acting as if the arches of the rainbows would lead you to gold
when in reality you followed the path of a painful plague
whose toxic venom will never escape your vain
you beg and you plead for someone else to fall on their knees
as you did for them, but in the end, they never do for you
you’re the girl that gives, the one who pours from an empty glass
and though you’re all grown up now, you continue devote
your time and energy to people and places that don’t keep you afloat
daily you drown under the deluge of your own tears
wondering why you’ve stayed with this for years
yet you still reach out to the rainbow’s arch asking for a coin
because deep down you are still the little girl in braids
the one who ran around afraid of ghosts, but now you chase them
for you dance with your devil, the one who calls your name
your mental mirage deceives you, as does your demon
but you always go back with that same empty glass
just hoping, just wishing, just praying someone would fill it
your moon is not broken.
to accept the moon
you can’t only have its crescent
you don’t pick and choose
what you have and what you lose
though it has its cracks and its craters
and the dark, unknown side
you love the moon for what it is
not for what it lacks
you, similar to the moon, have flaws
but, love yourself for them
not in spite of them
and while you embody this satellite
do not be fearful of your darker facet
to be vulnerable and allow a visitor in
and just because it’s dark
doesn’t mean you haven’t seen the light
and the cavities and craters
do not mean you’re crazy
having a hole does not mean you are broken
the rugged, rocky moon is similar
to the scars your heart has
but similar to the moon, you are beautiful
your acceptance is your completeness
you come full circle, as the moon does
we hold onto our first loves because
we think they are all we’ll ever have
your love for that individual will never die
but you have to take your pain and your heartbreak
and fill the cracks of your broken heart
because you will be able to love again
and so will they
but never forget how you loved them
because you’ll never love someone so purely ever again