Its 4:30 am and im up... again. And its your fault. You know... as i lay here and long for your touch, crave the feel of your skin against mine, I remember the feel of your soft, warm breath on my exposed neck as you sleep nussled tightly next to you. I miss you. I want you. But more importantly... I hate you. I hate what you did to me. The person you turned me into.

But thats love isn't it? You change your ways for someone only to get told you're not good enough.

Yes I had my problems but I've since fixed those and now after I've finally gathered all the pieces of the heart you shattered, stomped on, and scattered into the wind. You want me back?

Why? Because you were wrong? Because someone like me can change for the better?

Or is because I'm finally happy?

That must be it... I've finally got you out of my life yet you find a way to sneak inside my head...

Let us not forget this time last year when I was parked on the bridge about to drive off who did I call 10 times?

You.

Who never once answered?

You.

A year to the day and I sit here with pills in my hand ready to just end it all and I stop to think.

Maybe that's exactly what you want. You've said it before, numerous times. So that must be why you're here. Why you always find a way to sneak in to my head or my heart.

But I have news for you. I've figured it out. This has always been a race. And you've always been the Bunny. And I've always been the slow turtle. But honestly... I think i just won.

He walks with his head held high,

Smile on his face, when his soul wants to cry.

Piercing eyes of an emerald shade,

A battered Man his past has made.

Torn, broken, battered, brused,

Once gave his heart only to be used.

Now a mask, a strong, confident... being

A drone on autopilot, that is until seeing,

Those eyes, a shimmer of gold in the spring light,

Emeralds with gold what a beautiful sight.

You light a spark inside him he’s never felt before,

Like a raging fire it keeps him wanting more.

You look at him, he melts, words don’t make sense. Colors are bright, too bright, black and then you!

Your smile, your eyes, your face, your hair

That Sass, your grin, your laugh, your stare...

You make his stomach flutter and his heart ache,

He wants you, He needs you, cant happen? Fate

His mask slips, confidence fades, He simply must go,

Not a word uttered but surely you know.