When you think about yourself as an individual, in what way would you say that you are? The reality is that people are walking ecosystems hosting millions of cells, each with their own day to day tasks. The idea that you are a “single” being is just an illusion to keep you functioning and moving. There really is no “I” in fact it would be more appropriat to say “us” when refering to yourself.

Hi, my name is Shirley… Detective Shirley. Ok so maybe I’m not a real Detective, but I am the kid that other kids come to for help solving mysteries. I’m currently in the fourth grade and am practically an adult, but the grownups still treat me like I’m some kind of child. It’s tough being a small adult in this world, but somehow I manage to deal with the age discrimination. So I bet you're wondering… How did a little girl like me end up on the path of a mystery solver? Well, it all started back in the fourth grade.

I had just moved from a small country town in the middle of nowhere to a big booming city filled with people. It was really sad for me at first, having to leave all my friends behind, but I liked the idea of experiencing a new place filled with adventure. Every nook and cranny of my old town had already been explored by yours truly, so the idea of being able to move to a city rekindled my adventurous side. I was just about finished with half of the semester at my new school, Elmwood Elementary, and so far, things weren’t going all that well. I’m not talking about grades though; because I mean come on, no one really cares about that stuff. No… what wasn’t going all that well for me was making new friends. Which if you’ve ever transferred schools midterm, then you know exactly what I was going through.

There were just so many kids here at this new school and I didn’t know a single one. Back in my home town, there were only about twelve others in my grade, but here I couldn’t even count the number of kids. Instead of all of us going to the same classes we were split up into different schedules. We were all in the same grade, but we had different classes at different times. It was so confusing seeing so many other students in each of my classes. I couldn’t for the life of me remember people’s names.

So, I had a brilliant idea to help me with my problem. I began carrying around a small notepad and pen. “Well how does that help you?” You might be asking. Well, I began writing down other kids names onto it and next to those names, I would put a few notes about that person so that I could always look through it and recognize who was who. I figured this would help me remember the other children’s names, but sadly the others didn’t recognize my brilliance.

Instead, they began calling me “Stalker” and I mean that literally. If you haven’t discovered this yet than I applaud you because kids are hands down some of the meanest creatures on Earth. But of course, I’m not like them because I’ve been told I’m very mature for my age.

I didn’t let the nickname bother me all that much, but it still didn’t feel good having people call me that. Then one day, an event took place that would change my life from then on. A teacher had come into the classroom with a fresh plate of chocolate chip cookies!

Chapter 2

That’s right you heard me. A warm steaming pile of chocolate chip cookies straight from the oven! It was a marvelous sight to behold for all the students in class C-2. The smell was almost irresistible. I don’t even remember how I managed to keep myself under control.

You see, Mrs. Addison was our math teacher and she had told us a week prior to our mid-term that if everyone passed, then she would bake cookies for the entire class. That incentive was good enough for me, because I studied like crazy to earn those delicious chocolatey treats!

“Ok kids,” Mrs. Addison began to speak, “I’m so proud of all of you for your hard work, so for performing so well I’ve made you all the cookies that I promised! You’ll all be able to enjoy your well-earned dessert right after you all finish lunch.” However, when lunch was finally over, we left the cafeteria towards Mrs. Addison’s class to enjoy our just desserts, my mouth, as well as others, would never be able to taste the soft baked goodness that those cookies possessed, for you see, by the time we could have them… They had already disappeared!

“Noooo, how could the cookies have just disappeared like that!” You might be screaming, and yet, that’s exactly what I said when I saw the empty plate just sitting on the desk, nothing remaining of the sweet sweet dessert besides crumbs.

“But how did they just disappear? Did they teleport out of thin air? Could it have been aliens! Or maybe even… the COOKIE MONSTER! Oh please Shirley you just have to tell me!” The questions you must be having already running through my mind. You need to calm down though, and breath in deeply then exhale slowly, less you lose your marbles.

Breath In…

Now breath out…

You ok now? Are you ready to hear the rest? Good!

I know that this case was an emergency at the highest level. A code red, nothing else topped it, but it wasn’t aliens or the cookie monster, only little kids believe in the cookie monster, and in order to solve this mystery I needed to leave behind my childish imagination.

No… this was the work of someone acting out of selfishness.

“I’m terribly sorry kids, but someone must have snuck in here and eaten all of them… and you all worked so hard to earn them.” Mrs. Addison said, expressing her sadness to the heartbroken class.

My heart had sunk when I noticed the empty plate. I had spent my whole weekend studying just for that one moment where the sugary sweets would overload my senses. Yet, someone had taken that chance away from me. Someone decided that only they deserved the cookies, and that no one other than them should get to enjoy any.

Some cried… Others merely left in disappointment for their next class, but not me. No… I was determined that whoever was behind this heinous crime would be put on trial for this, and that the judge would scream “Off With Your Head!”... Wait, I think that's from a different story. Let’s try to stay on topic here. This moment ignited a spark into a kindling flame that had been residing within me for a long time, and I wasn’t going to stop at anything until justice had been done.

Starting with nothing but my handy notepad and pen. I waited for the rest of the students to leave, and had a little private chat with the cookie chef herself. I knew that there was no way that Mrs. Addison would have eaten them, but I had to start my search from somewhere and what better place than the kind hearted cookie crafter herself.

Chapter 3

“Oh Shirley... is there something you need?” Mrs. Addison asked, as I stood there with an unwavering glare that gleamed curiosity.

“Actually… Yes, I have a couple questions for you.” I told her, in the most professional way I could. I knew that since I was dealing with the teacher I’d have to be careful with what I said. If I slipped up my choice of words I could wind up in trouble.

“Ok sure, but we can’t chat for too long, I wouldn’t want you to be late for your next class.”

“Ugh… don’t remind me about that.” I had thought to myself, as history was next and that was my least favorite class.

“This won’t take long; I was just wondering if you could give me the names of the students whom you think could have eaten the cookies?”

“Oh my… and what are you going to do if I told you them?” She asked, curious to know if I was going to cause any trouble.

“It’s just that… I feel like the person responsible for this shouldn’t be allowed to get away with it, you know? I want to find out who did this and report that person to you!” I exclaimed, honestly believing that she would support my decision. Mrs. Addison was one of the nicest teachers here at the school that I have had the pleasure to meet so far, and I was confident that she would want to help!

“Hmm… I don’t know if I should trust a student with this task…” She exclaimed, puzzled over the difficult position she was in. “I’ll tell you what, since you haven’t caused any trouble so far, if you promise to come to me immediately after figuring out who stole the cookies then I’ll give you the names, but you need to have some sort of proof in order to convince me who did it.” She stated, lifting up her hand while holding out her pinky. It was clear to me that she wanted to make a real promise, and everyone knows that in order to make a true promise you have to pinky swear on it. That meant she was really serious about me coming back to her first thing with proof, and I was under no obligation to break it. For breaking a pinky promise is a sin amongst sins.

Once the promise was made, she began to give me the names of students who could have potentially stolen the cookies.

“Well, the only ones who could have stolen them are Tyler, Kim, Brock, and Ashlynn. The others were with us during launch so it couldn’t have possibly been them.” She said.

“Oh yeah she’s right!” I thought to myself realizing that the majority of us were in fact together during the only possible time the cookies could have been stolen. That means the suspects have already been narrowed down to four people! Yes! Justice will prevail and the cookie thief shall be punished!

“Now I guess it’s about time you head off to your next class, good luck with your search!” She exclaimed.

After giving her a brief thank you I took off for my next class… A good Ol’ fashioned history lecture. Ugh…

Chapter 4

How I managed to survive history that day is a mystery in of itself. I swear it was the most boring time I have ever had in a class before. Was it the looming mystery of the cookie thief that had my anxiety up high or the fact that we were going over the Mesopotamian Culture; I don’t really know.

Prior to the end class, I took advantage of my teacher’s ignorance of my lack of attention to look up the names on my notepad that Mrs. Addison had given me, and then come up with a plan of attack.

I was very sly, you see, when it came to “pretending” to be paying attention in class. I had carefully propped up my history book in a vertical position, relying on the hard covers to keep it from falling. This way the teacher wouldn’t be able to tell what it was I was really doing with my time. It was genius I tell you, genius! I should write a book about the Art of Not Paying Attention in Class but Looking Like You Really Are… Ok well it would need a better title than that, but I could probably make millions off of it! Is there no end to my brilliance!

Anyways… Oh wait where was I? I kind of distracted myself… Have I told you about the cookies yet? I have!? Right… I knew that, I was just making sure you were still paying attention. Ok, now I remember.

I figured I’d start in alphabetical order and proceed like this. I would wait till the end of class and then use the five minutes I had in order to interrogate Ashlynn. Luckily, she and I were in the same history class together, so I didn’t have to go out searching for her.

I took a look at my notes in order to find the description I had previously written up of Ashlynn. Her characteristics were:

• Short

• Shy

• Smart

• Wears Glasses

There was about three minutes left in class before the bell would ring, signaling our time to leave. So I had begun to think of various methods to start my conversation with her.

From her description that I had written in my notepad, Ashlynn was a pretty timid girl; so I figured I should act like a bad cop and force the answers out of her.

“Where were you during lunch!?” I would shout.

“I know you weren’t with the rest of us, who were eating with Mrs. Addison in celebration of passing the test, so the thief had too have been you!”

“Where are the cookies!” I would say as I pressured her for answers, but while I was in my train of thought, I failed to notice the tall figure looming over my desk.

“Ahem…” It coughed.

“Eeek!” I let out in surprise, barely hanging on too my ghostly spirit which I swear had begun to leave my body. After my sharp shriek, I looked up to find the figure was the teacher whose name I never learned.

“Well I guess if someone would rather stare out into no man’s land than pay attention to this important information, then that person wouldn’t mind heading over to the principal’s office.” He exclaimed sternly. Just for the record before we move on, the man had an egg shaped head… and he smelt bad… Just thought you should know that.

Oh no… Not the principal’s office. I was told the principle was a vile demon, who would suck the fun right out of anyone! Any student who was sent there never came back the same...

Jimmy was a perfect example of this. The students used to call him “Jimmy Cricket” because he would constantly be interrupting classes with his humor. Get it? Cuz crickets chirp a lot! and… *cough*yeah, I’m sure you got the joke so I'll just continue onward with the story...

He used to be so happy, so full of energy, that it would often get him into trouble, but he was extremely funny. Then one day, a teacher got tired of Jimmy’s constant interruptions and sent him to the principal’s office.

Ever since then, he just sits at his desk in each class and rarely talks to anyone. Almost like he's completely zoned out of everything else. I’m not entirely sure what the principle did too him exactly, but whatever it was I didn’t want to end up like him.

I choked back the feeling of anguish and somehow managed to look up at him without crying and said “Yes sir…” in a defeated tone as I gathered my things and began making my way out of the classroom. Anyone else would have broken down in that situation, but I managed to keep myself together under the pressure of the Egg Headed teacher’s stern order.

As I shut the door to the classroom behind me, I began to stumble my way too the principal's office when a sudden realization overcame me. Perhaps this is actually a blessing in disguise! Instead of going to the principal's office I can use this time to investigate for clues regarding the cookies!

And if I happened to get caught wandering around I can simply say that I was new and didn’t know where his office was, which in fact wasn’t entirely a lie but I figured it was better than not having an excuse at all.

The investigation would have to wait though as the bell too release the students had begun too ring, so I decided to backtrack in order to interrogate Ashlynn. I figured it would be best to gather as much information as I could from her before the next class started.

Chapter 5

When the door opened, I waited for Ashlynn to make her way out of the room. The moment I saw her I immediately called out to her.

“Hey Ashlynn!” I screamed to get her attention

“Eeeek!?” Was her reply as she jumped up in the air, dropping her textbook midflight. I swear, I’d heard she was skittish but all I did was say her name.

“Y-y-yes?” She stuttered as she kneeled down to gather her fallen material, her heavy breathing signifying how truly startled she was.

“Where were you during lunch!? Was it you who stole the cookies!? Huh! Say something thief!”

“Why don’t you have proof before calling someone a thief Stalker!” A girl said as she exited the door opposite of my history class. I pulled out my notepad in order to figure out who she was.

• Tall

• Always looks angry

• Athletic

• Has an older brother

I assumed by her athletic build and the fact that she looked like she was about to punch me, that the girl standing in front of me was, in fact, Kim.

“Now look at what you’ve done you’ve made Ashlynn cry!” She said as she made her way to the fallen Ashlynn, who’s eyes now contained tears. Just the sad sight of the poor girl made me realize that her heart could have in no way held the evil needed to steal cookies from anyone.

“What are you even doing accusing people of stealing those cookies huh!? Who gave you the right to say outlandish things like that and make my best friend Ashlynn cry!” She began screaming, the turning heads of other students forcing me to realize the embarrassing situation I had put myself in.

“I… I just thought that…”

“You thought what!?” She interrupted, “That you’d take your anger out on others and wildly accuse them of something they didn’t do!” The look in her eyes were like daggers piercing my heart.

“She’s right though.” I thought to myself. Never once did I stop to think about how my forceful questioning on Ashlynn would make her feel. I was so caught up in the chase that I didn’t even care about how my words would affect her.

“Look, if you want to know where we were at, then I’ll tell you. We ate our lunch in the library like we always do. Ashlynn doesn’t like the loud noise in the cafeteria and I personally find the silent library a more enjoyable place to be since people like YOU aren’t there! If you want proof you can just ask Mrs. Lawrence about us. She’s the librarian and she saw us there like always.”

My eyes began to water, filling themselves with salty tears. My heart, burning from the pain of what I had done, couldn’t take much more. Having nothing to say, I looked down at the ground. No longer able to face them.

“Tsk. Let’s go Ashlynn before she tries to accuse us of something else we didn’t do.” Kim finished and walked away, tugging her friend by the arm.

“I… I’m sorry…” I choked, unable to tell if my apology was heard or not. The murmuring of the students around me who saw the scene began to ring in my ears.

“Is that the stalker chick?”

“I can’t believe she made Ashlynn cry!”

“She must be crazy!”

“It’s no wonder she doesn’t have any friends.”

No matter where I looked, all I could see were the faces of the other students looking down on me.

“Stop looking at me like that. I didn’t mean it… I’m sorry!” I said to myself. The salty tears that had filled my eyes now ran down the sides of my face like a waterfall of pain and sorrow.

I ran... As fast as I could to the girls’ bathroom. Unable to keep my emotions in check, I needed a place where I could be alone for a bit.

Dashing past several on lookers, I locked myself within one of the bathroom stalls. Within a matter of seconds, I crumpled to the ground and let my emotions take over.

Chapter 6

Now I know at this point in the story things get pretty emotional. You must be saying to yourself, “Oh poor Shirley, if only the other kids knew that you didn’t mean any harm in what you were saying. You were only trying to solve the case for the sake of justice.”

To which ends I would say, “Your absolutely right curious reader!” But this experience taught me something important about being a detective… Never accuse someone of something they didn’t do. Even if you’re just trying to get information. “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will cut like daggers!” A little somethin’ somethin’ I like to say to myself to remind me how I should treat others.

Don’t think for a second that this was the end for Ol’ fourth grader Shirley, however. The pain I felt at the time was tremendous, but I knew it would mean nothing if I didn’t persevere through it.

After a few minutes, I began to gather myself. Knowing that I couldn’t take back what I said I felt even more obligated to catch the cookie thief! Once I’d finally gotten proof of who did it I would be sure to give Ashlynn a proper apology for accusing her.

I decided to take their word for it when they said they had been in the library during the time the crime could have taken place. The emotions they expressed weren’t something that a kid could imitate so I figured it would be better to learn about the other two students who were potential cookie thieves. If nothing turned up, then I could always go check for sure if the two of them were fibbing.

Tyler and Brock were the only other kids who could have possible known about and had the chance to steal the cookies. Taking out my trusty notepad, I took a look at the description of both of them:

Brock:

• Spikey hair

• Funny

• Pudgy

• Hispanic

Tyler:

• Tall

• Short Hair

• Always wears collard shirts

• Has asthma

“The time to leave the safety of the bathroom was nigh!” I screamed aloud in my mind. Knowing that the cookie thief was just in my grasp. I left the bathroom… Only to then realize that I had no idea where the two of them could possibly be at.

Come to think of it… I had no idea where I was at! During my rush for safety I didn’t even look around to see where exactly it was that I was going. I merely kept running till I found a bathroom.

Perhaps I had gone up a flight of stairs… Or did I go down. “Ahg!” I shouted knowing full well that I was now lost in the giant school.

“Why couldn’t it just by one hall and one story like my last school!” Knowing that my old school was nowhere near capable of sustaining the number of students here, I had begun to rant to myself anyway.

“You wanted adventure Shirley well now you have it.” Throwing my arms to the side I began to walk in a random direction. Hopping I’d see something that was familiar to me and could possibly show me where I was at.

Most schools tend to have similar plans per floor of the building, but Elm Wood was different. You see, it used to be an old abandoned hospital, so each floor was designed a little bit differently in order to accommodate for the various equipment they needed. Since they decided to leave the floor plans pretty much unchanged during the remodeling, it ended up being a maze for people like myself who were new.

After a few minutes of strolling aimlessly down the hall… I began to hear something rather peculiar. It was some kind of strange moaning noise though it was clear by the tone that it was in pain. Unsure of exactly what it was, I made my way towards it. Cautiously, I approached the door to what I assumed was the school’s infirmary based on the sign that stated “Infirmary”.

Before I tell you what happened next, I would like to let you know that I was in no way shape or form scared out of my mind at this time. Sure, the moaning noise sounded horrifying and my legs maaaay have been shaking, but that was only because lunch didn’t feel me up so I felt a little light. I’m a growing girl and the small servings at school just aren’t enough for anyone!

The moment I took a step into the room I knew something was strange. The first thing that alarmed me was the temperature difference. The hall had a fairly standard room temperature yet this room felt like you could store raw cow meat! Secondly, was the privacy curtain. Something felt off about it.

Hello everyone. I'm sure the words "Net Neutrality" have passed through your ear canals at some point recently, but I have just had an urge to help get the message out that we need to take a stand and let the FCC know that we do not want to be rid of net neutrality.

To put it simply, the only people who benefit from the removal are the service providers who are in favor of its abolishment. The internet businesses would face extra charges to ensure their content is delivered to their customers and the common folk who just want to get online and look at pictures of cats would find that their favorite sites are loading extremely slowly because those sites didn't want to "bow down" to the gatekeepers and pay their "fast lane" fees.

The thing is... the internet isn't broken, so why in the world are they trying to change it?  I understand that some services are just so huge that it's hard to compete with... Like youtube for example, but this change would heavily benefit the ISP's and give them the power to put their services well above anyone else's. At least with the current laws in place, it's illegal for an isp to favor any one service over another.

For more information about how the internet will be, and I stress this part as I have no trust in the majority of ISP involved in this case, affected due to this, check out the attached link for a video that does a pretty good job of explaining how the change can affect you as the customer.

You can also check out: https://www.battleforthenet.com/

For more information on what it is You can do to stop this from happening.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on the topic, so please leave a comment down below if you agree with me or think differently!

I'd love to buy some of your girl scout cookies, but my doctor told me that if I eat any more of them, even just one, then I would explode and launch chunks of my flesh and organs onto everyone around me! The combination of the sugar and other life shortening ingredients found in your cookies would build up large amounts of gas that my body just wouldn't be able to handle, thus resulting in my gory death. The bloody stains and guts that my body would leave on the surfaces of my explosive death would result in the area being marked off, as no other human being would ever want to come into contact with anything my blown up body came into contact with.

The smell would attract beings from hell, who would drag helpless victims who came too close to the scene and rip their skin from their body. The demons would place the skins of their victims on the walls of the area to display their demonic passion to all who came by. Once they gather enough victims, they would commence a demonic ceremony to summon their demon master who would rain death upon the earth.

Humanity would be at a great risk of extinction as the demons from hell slaughtered any living being they could find. The amount of death and destruction would throw the world into an apocalyptic melt down before ultimately causing the earth itself to explode. Ending all life on earth as we know it.

The amount of lost souls from earth would cause a black hole, the size of which the observable universe has never beard witness too. All things that have ever been would be sucked up into this black hole, which after sucking up everything in existence, would implode on itself eliminating all existence and cause an end to everything...

Also, I don't have cash...

A dream is the life of a lie

With stories to tell in the blink of an eye

Long, short, and sometimes forgetful

Yet it's not entirely blissful

Some nights the darkness comes in fast

With guns, daggers, and blood soaked masks

Running and screaming the shrieks your hearing

Muttering and suffering till you wake up screaming

A lie you tell yourself, mostly calming

To ease yourself from the midnight calling

The real world awaits your day begins

Until at last your long day ends

Everything you want is here

Relax and enjoy, your mind clear

This is your life for you to enjoy

Till you wake up and scream filling with noise

A dream is the life of a lie

With stories to tell in the blink of an eye

Reminding you of your pitiful life

And the lie that awaits after you die

I sat down by the river Styx

Watching all the ghostly chicks

Flying quickly downstream

Their souls fairly far from free,

Alas the past has come so fast

A Blast, A flash of life I had

Shortly lived some would say...

Yet years don't make you feel alive

A scream or two when others die

The thrill when squeals came from the females I killed

Their blood wrenched bodies would further still

Never resting my urges for fun

When others unravel what it was I had done

My death came, though it was hardly classy

A victim's friend was rather flashy

Dressed my body up they surely did

Then ran from the cops, and must have hid

So now I sit by the River Styx

Looking at all the potential chicks

Many had said I would burn in hell

But heaven surely awaits the place I will dwell

Home is where comfort lies

Where you can relax and let your worries die

Your thoughts, dreams, and passions are here

Yet sometimes are foggy and unclear

Your world is perceived by this

And your reality is simply apart of it

Your worst nightmares come from here

Yet it shares the same place as your happiness

You are you, and your home is always with you

A man with a mask on his face

Does so to travel to a particular place

The past surrounds the journey he makes

As his feet move at a quick pace

His crimes bring him good times, better then how noble men dine on red wine

Whether or not fines, confine him, does not define or defile him

He'll take and make profit, from the pockets of those yelling "Stop It!"

The Illusions of his misuses, of weapons like knifes and pistols he uses

Till his dying day, while hes lying away, he will take and break, from all those with unfortunate fates