So it's nearly 9:30am here in Seoul, and for some reason I'm awake. I'm not a morning person so this is unheard of for me without an alarm clock there to wake me up.

South Korea so far has been an interesting, albeit tiring experience, and it's only going to get more tiring as time goes on. In a few hours we'll be off to the cinema and doing some shopping around, and then hopefully going to a sheep cafe, or a raccoon cafe. Or hopefully both!

Yesterday was spent in Gangnam, and honestly it wasn't what I had expected. In a way I had pictured Gangnam to be a bit like Manchester in terms of shopping, but it was totally different.

The main road was essentially gridlocked from the second we entered Gangnam via the subway, to the moment we left via the subway. We took to the back roads instantly where there were hundreds more shops and cafes as far as the eyes could see. People walked in the middle of the road, as cars manoeuvred slowly down the narrow streets. Not a pavement in sight. Cars and bikes honked at oblivious people who hadn't heard their approach, frightening the life out of more than one unsuspecting person and causing them to quickly scurry out of the way. The heat was intense, but the rain provided a small amount of relief at least. The shops and cafes we dipped in and out of were well air conditioned, and a welcome retreat from the sweltering heat.

The food we ate was different, but interesting. Not something my usually rather simple palette was used to. Some foods I enjoyed, and others not so much. But I'm glad I tried them at least. Lunch was a bolognese, which was more like chilli if I'm honest. Fairly spicy, but just within my range of tolerance. Only barely though. My friend's pasta had a more creamy sauce that I tried and sadly wasn't a fan of. The bread bowl it came in however was deliciously soft and a welcome cleanse to my burning mouth. As well, we had steak with some oddly shaped chips, and a choice of sweet chilli, or barbecue dipping sauce. The steak was cooked wonderfully and was beautifully tender. It melted in my mouth and tasted fantastic. I'd gladly have eaten that to myself! A blue lemonade shocked my eyes, but was powerfully sweet, with a slight tang that was refreshing and delicious.

Next, at a Paris Baguette, we bought cake and more drinks to cater to our chocolate cravings. A large chocolate volcano cake was my sweet of choice, though maybe a bit too ambitious for me, as I was sadly unable to finish it. The cake was beautifully moist and dusted in icing sugar. Sticky chocolate sauce was dribbled down the side and made eating it a little messy; but added to the wonderful experience.

The peach and mango drink was too sweet for me, and most of it was left to the bin. That being said, I wasn't a fan of the grape one my friend had either!

One my friend's boyfriend had left to go to a talk he was part of, my friend and I wandered the streets. The second the heavens opened, almost everyone took out an umbrella to take shelter under. My friend and I only having the one we took from the hotel, we nipped into a store called Art Box. It had just what we were looking for and so much more. Umbrellas a plenty, and lovely cool air conditioning; amongst other things. Racks of socks lined the walls, stationary and unbelievably cheap notebooks were everywhere. The temptation was so overwhelming, but I stayed strong. For now at least. We bought our few pieces, and went on to look for a cosmetics store called Tony Moly. One that is very popular, but that I had never seen. It took us a lot of walking to find one, but left without making a purchase. The time wasn't right, it seems. A young Korean woman tried her hardest to communicate with us, her English clearly lacking, with my Korean in the same state. However, my friend and I highly appreciated her attempt.

It wasn't long before the heat and pure exhaustion kicked in, my friend becoming rather unwell and myself suffering a headache that was verging on a migraine. After locating the boyfriend of my friend, we retrieved the room key, and made our way back to the subway station. Rush hour must have just begun, as people were everywhere. The subway was extremely crowded and we had to squeeze to get on board. After getting on the wrong direction on the second leg of the journey, we quickly made amends and were on our way back. The subway unbelievably quick, a shock to anyone not expecting it. Thankfully I was pre-warned before we got on the first time, and held on for dear life as we sped from stop to stop.

The biggest relief of the entire day, was that flop onto the bed. The bed I am in isn't the softest or the comfiest, but it provides respite to my weary body.

And now, as I sit here at 9:30am, I wonder what today will bring. What new experiences I will have after it, and what wonder will come to behold me.

A booming clap of thunder tore through the dark night sky as heavy rain lashed against the windows of a small orphanage. Most of the residents within the orphanage were fast asleep, exhausted after the day’s antics. Not even the noise of the thunder was enough to wake them, their dreams keeping them in a peaceful sleep and totally unaware of what was happening. A couple of the older children and a couple of the workers were sitting up in their rooms, watching as lightning bolts danced across the sky. Making intricate patterns in the air and no two strikes looking the same. After every lightning strike, they would count out how long it would take for the next rumble of thunder to follow, in an attempt to estimate how far away the storm was taking place.

However, there was one person in the orphanage who was terrified of the storm. A young man was hiding, curled up under his bed with a blanket wrapped tightly around him. His hands were covering his ears in an attempt to block out the noise. Andrew had been terrified of thunderstorms for as long as he could remember. Even though they didn’t happen very often, his fear of them never went away and they never got any easier for him to deal with. People had stopped coming to his side during thunderstorms years ago, instead just leaving him to deal with his fear totally alone. He’d learned over time that covering his ears and using a blanket to block out the blinding flash helped a little, but no matter how hard he tried a little bit of noise always came through. Even though he kept his phone on his bedside table to charge, he never remembered to grab it when a storm began so he had nothing to take his mind off of it. When everything fell silent for a while, Andrew could hear his T.V. playing quietly. The volume had to be kept quiet to ensure that he didn’t wake up the two children who slept in the room next to his. It was rare that Andrew was asleep before two in the morning and most of the children were asleep by nine O’clock, so he had to make sure that he was quiet with everything he did. He wasn’t sure how the thunder didn’t wake them up, but him having his T.V. just a notch too high was enough to send them screaming to the workers.

For a few minutes, it seemed like the storm had stopped which was a relief to Andrew who hadn’t moved from under his bed. Being unable to see the flashes of lightning worked against him though and just as he was starting to relax, the next loud rumble sounded. There were tears in his eyes and his entire body was shaking in fear. He was curled up in a ball, biting hard onto his lip hard enough to draw blood. With his hands clasped over his ears, there was no way for him to wipe away the tears that were streaming down his face. Andrew hated that he cried during the storms, it made him feel weak and pathetic. Though no matter how hard he tried, panic always set in and he couldn’t stop himself from crying in hopes that someone would come to his side. Taking his hands away from his ears and tugging the blanket down from over his face, Andrew dared to take a look out from his little cocoon. Almost instantly, a bright flash enveloped the room, followed quickly by an ear shattering clap of thunder that seemed like it was directly over the orphanage. A terrified scream tore itself from Andrew’s throat, his uncovered ears ringing from the intense strike. Yanking the blanket back over his head, Andrew sobbed against the soft fabric, his hands squeezing tightly over his ears once more.

His crying, combined with his hands over his ears prevented him from hearing when someone entered his room. From under the blanket, he couldn’t see anything which was exactly what he wanted. When a hand touched his arm, Andrew flinched but he couldn’t bring himself to come out. He felt safe under the bed and he didn’t want to compromise his safety by coming out whilst the storm was still raging on. The hand never left his arm, being a constant reassuring presence to him and helped him to slowly calm down.

“Lily...?” Andrew asked quietly when he had finally been able to stop crying. She was the only person who he believed would come to his side to comfort him. He felt the blanket being moved away from his face, and after a few moments he could see a familiar face with a worried expression. Reaching out slowly, Lily ran her fingers through Andrew’s long dark hair. She wasn’t the most petite person in the world, but she managed to squeeze herself under the bed and wrap her arms around him, holding him close to her. Slowly, Lily moved his hands away from his ears and put an earphone in each hand, coaxing him to put them in. Andrew didn’t hesitate to put them in and he heard some soothing music playing. He couldn’t place what it was, but he was far beyond caring. All he knew was that it was loud enough to prevent him from hearing anything else that was going on around him. For what seemed like hours, the two of them laid under the bed in silence. Lily gently rubbed Andrew’s back to reassure him and to keep him calm until long after the storm had passed. It was hard for him not to fall asleep, and he almost drifted off a couple of times. Though the music did a good job of waking him back up before he got into too deep of a sleep.

When Lily was certain that the storm had totally stopped and that there would be no more scares for Andrew that night, she carefully took the earphones out of his ears. His eyes had been closed, but as soon as he felt her tug them out he opened his eyes and looked up at her.

“It’s okay.” She said in a quiet voice. “The storm has passed. You’re safe.”

For a few minutes, Andrew didn’t move. Just listening out for anything that even resembled a clap of thunder. To his relief, he couldn’t hear anything other than the loud music that was still playing through the earphones, the T.V. that was still on, and Lily’s gentle breathing.

“Thank you… For coming to be with me…” Andrew said quietly, giving Lily a soft smile. “No-one comes anymore.”

Lily squeezed him gently and pressed a soft kiss to his forehead before slowly retreating out from under the bed. Untangling himself from his blanket, Andrew pushed it out from under the bed before squirming out and getting to his feet.

“I knew that after that thunderclap that struck overhead I couldn’t leave you alone. You needed someone with you.” Lily brushed a lock of hair gently away from his face and tucked it behind his ear out of the way. She had always acted like a mother towards Andrew, since his very first moments in the orphanage. Lily had always been the one who Andrew knew he could turn to with any problem and he trusted her with his life.

Taking a small step forwards, Andrew wrapped his arms around Lily and hugged her close. He was so thankful for her being there and she had helped him through so much in his life.

It had been Lily who had explained to him, when he had been old enough to understand, that he had been left on the doorstep of the orphanage when he had been only three months old. Andrew had been left in a small wicker basket, swaddled in a waterlogged blanket when he had been discovered in the middle of the night by Lily and one of the other workers. Lily had explained that she hadn’t known how long he’d been out on the front doorstep, wailing and screaming in fear as a thunderstorm raged on overhead, and also in pain from the cold rain that had seeped through his blanket and even though his onesie. After getting him safely inside and out of the cold, Lily had removed the blanket from him and peeled off his drenched onesie before wrapping him in a soft towel to dry him off. It had taken her nearly an hour to warm him up enough to stop him from shivering, but it had taken a lot longer to stop him from crying. Lily tried everything, from getting him a bottle of formula, to turning on the T.V. and putting on a children’s programme for him to watch. Eventually, she had laid down with him on her chest and rubbed his back, whilst singing whatever song had come into her head at the time. Only when he had finally worn himself out and fallen asleep did he finally stop crying, which had been a relief to both Lily and everyone else in the orphanage.

When Andrew didn’t break the hug after a few minutes, Lily looked up at him and reached up to caress his cheek.

“Hey, are you okay? You seem distracted.” Lily’s soft hand brushed against his skin and brought him quickly out of his thoughts, but instead of moving away from her, he only hugged her tighter to him.

“I just want to say thank you. For everything. Not just for tonight.” Andrew said softly against her hair. He stood a lot taller than Lily so it was easy for him to rest his chin on the top of her head.

Lily had a smile plastered on her face as she hugged him back before she stood up on her tiptoes to place a soft kiss on his cheek. “You know you don’t need to thank me Drew. I’ve always been here, and will always be here for you.”

Finally breaking the hug, Andrew stepped back and sat on his bed, bringing his legs up and crossing them under him so he was comfy. The mattress was soft and sank slightly under his weight, but it only made it more comfortable for him to sit and sleep on. Laid on his pillow was a sketch pad that was open on a half-completed picture of a horse, drawn against a hilly backdrop with a stream running through a grassy plain.

“That’s a nice picture Drew. I wish you’d draw more often. The other kids and I love it.” Lily picked up his sketch pad and looked through a few of his previous drawings. Most of them were unfinished because he’d ended up getting bored of them, or had to go out to do some chores and had never come back to whatever piece he had been working on at the time. He wasn’t sure whether or not he’d finish the horse. It was a piece that he liked, which was rare because he believed that most of his work belonged in the bin or as fuel for a fire, so there was a good chance of him finishing it off, or at least working on it a little more.

“I was working on it before the storm hit. There was nothing on T.V. and there isn’t exactly a lot I can do when the rest of the kids are asleep.” He shrugged, watching as Lily studied one of his older pieces. Her soft brown eyes taking in every minute detail that the fine pencil lines had to offer. Her slightly chubby face was glowing with happiness and wonder.

“You can always try sleeping at a reasonable time, instead of being up until all hours of the morning.” Lily teased as she closed the sketchbook and dropped it back down onto his pillow, making the pencil bounce slightly and roll off the pillow and onto the floor.

“But I can’t sleep early. You know that. I haven’t been able to for years.” Andrew said as he lay himself flat on his bed and reached down to retrieve the pencil, and also pulling his blanket up onto the bed. Andrew moved the sketchpad off of his pillow and set it down on his bedside table along with his pencil.

Taking hold of the edges of the blanket, Lily lifted it and let it settle down over Andrew. It made him feel as if he was a child again, being tucked in to bed before having a story read to him so he could settle down and go to sleep. He had a story read to him every night without fail until he was seven, when he decided he could read well enough by himself and told Lily that the younger children needed her attention. It didn’t stop her from going to his room to tuck him in and kiss him goodnight though. Even now at the age of eighteen, Lily still occasionally came into his room to wish him a good night, and even though he never said it; Andrew appreciated it to know that she still cared about him enough to check that he was okay.

“Well try turning the T.V. and the light off a bit earlier, closing your eyes, and settling down. If you want I can make you a glass of warm milk and some cookies.” Lily smiled as she teased him, reaching down and ruffling his dark brown shoulder length hair.

“I’m not a child Lily,” Andrew said with a smile. “though that does sound pretty good.”

Leaning down, Lily hugged Andrew close and placed a soft kiss on his head. When she stood back up, she had a soft smile on her face. “Goodnight Andrew. Try to get to sleep soon.”

With a reluctant nod, Andrew rolled onto his side and watched as Lily left the room, quietly closing the door behind her. For a while he could hear her footsteps in the hallway and going up and down the stairs before everything finally went quiet.

So I decided to look at agents on my lunch break today, and I've found a couple I really like. I'm not quite ready to go looking for an agent yet, but hopefully I will be soon. And I want to do some research now beforehand. Eventually I want to come up with a top three or five list of agents I would love to be with. I won't be disappointed if they don't take me on, I always set standards way too high for myself. But at the end of the day, all I can do is try my best!

Cold rain lashed against my bare skin, as I walked slowly down the street. I'd lost all sense of direction and had no idea where I was going. These nights were the hardest. The ones where uncertainty was rife, and the elements did nothing but work against me. Not that I minded the rain, but my hands were cold to the point where I couldn't feel my fingers. I wanted nothing more than to be curled up in front of a roaring fire, the heat seeping into my shivering body. But instead I'd be walking for god only knows how long. Maybe a few hours, or maybe a few days. I could only hope that the awful weather would subside. At least for a short while. Glancing up, I looked at the rolling countryside that spanned around me. There wasn't a single house in sight, nor any sign of somewhere I could take refuge. I was well and truly alone.

At least that was what I thought. Out of no-where, a car roared past next to me. Speeding right through the giant puddle that had accumulated because of the rain. The standing water sprayed all over me.

"You fucking asshole!" I screamed after them, not caring where they heard me or not. I needed to vent my frustrations and right now, screaming seemed to be the only way to do that. If I hadn't been drenched from head to toe before, I definitely was now. But now it wasn't just clean rain water I was wet with, it was horrible, dirty water. Hugging myself tightly, I slowly plodded on. Trying to keep a bit more distance between myself and the road in case some other jerk came speeding through. With no road signs anywhere in sight, I had no idea how long I'd been walking, nor how long I had left to go. The awful cold made me want nothing more than to turn back. Go back the way I'd come and go home. Unfortunately, that wasn't a viable option for me anymore. I'd left for a reason, and there was no way that I was going back.

So today I've realised something.

Since the age of ten I've wanted to be a published author with a publishing house and an agent.

Though I've always been anxious and scared of the day that I send my work off to a publisher or an agent.

But not out of fear of being rejected. I don't mind rejection.

It's out of fear of being accepted. I wouldn't know how to react if I got taken on. If I got published. It would be such a huge deal to me because I've wanted it for more than half my life.

https://m.facebook.com/Thesearchfortheperfectword-380415742165785/

Dark skies threatened to open the heavens and soak any unfortunate person who happened to be outside. Heavy winds wreaked havoc in the streets. Trees groaned under the force and leaves tried their hardest to cling on to the branches, but their attempts were useless. Most children were stuck in school and a lot of adults were at work or hiding at home from the battering they would receive off the ruthless wind. The unlucky people who happened to be on the street were fighting to get to their destinations. Some ran from place to place to limit the amount of time they had to spend in the terrible weather. There was only one type of person who could stand being in the gale force winds and one of them was walking slowly and happily through the quiet streets. A young man walked along, dodging past others who seemed totally oblivious to his presence. A slight smile tugged at his features as he watched a woman have her umbrella snatched out of her grip. He knew he could get it back for her if he wanted, but that would have been too easy. Running his fingers through his hair, he glanced around. He had an uncomfortable feeling that he was being watched, but that wasn’t a new feeling to him. Once he was content, he ducked into a small café. He made his way through to the back and ducked into the men’s bathroom. He didn’t need the toilet; instead he walked to one of the small sinks and looked in the mirror. A slight chuckle escaped his lips.

“Jesus Adrian. You need a serious haircut.” He spoke to his reflection upon noticing how long and unruly his hair had become.

The icy cold water of the lake was painfully cold against my pale skin, making goose bumps raise up all over my body. I had fully expected the water to be this cold, but it was still a shock to my system and I knew that there was no going back now. Getting out of the water wouldn’t change how agonisingly cold I was, so I just had to stay in the water and suffer through the pain until my body became accustomed to it. I squeezed my eyes shut tightly before taking in as much of a breath as I could and then dipping my head under the water. The sudden shock of the water against my face was enough to make me instantly exhale the breath I’d been holding and forced me to resurface so that I could breathe. My teeth uncontrollably chattered in my mouth as I started to swim around in an attempt to warm up my body before it started to shut down. The urge to rub my arms and legs was great, though I knew better than that. All it would do it drag the warm blood away from my heart and kill me faster. I didn’t intend for this swim to be fatal, so I limited myself to a mere five minutes in the water before getting out and drying myself off. The lake was a place that I frequented whenever I found myself unable to sleep. Since I lived only a short walk away, it was easy for me to access, and just as easy for me to return home to a warm shower afterwards.

The fresh morning air was a shock to my system as I left the moderate warmth of the house. All down the street, cars were sitting with a layer of pure white ice upon them. Including mine. With a groan, I zapped my car open and battled to get the door open, which appeared to be frozen shut. Not what I needed to be dealing with when I was in a rush. There was a slight mist lingering over the village, which made it a bit difficult for me to be able to see down to the end of the road. As I finally managed to yank the door free, I tossed my bag over into the passengers seat. Slipping the key into the ignition, I crossed my fingers and prayed that it would start first time. After a few moment of stuttering, the engine roared to life. Turning the heaters up go full, I quickly grabbed the ice scraper and set to work removing the thick layer of ice from the windows. It was a long process, but as the heaters started to kick in, it made my job slightly easier. Overhead, the sky was covered in a layer of light grey cloud, which only served to make the tone of the day duller.

It felt like I'd been at it for an hour when I finally finished and clambered into the car, pulling the door shut behind me. There was goose flesh all over my bare arms, and I had started to shiver. Though I hadn't realised it until I was sitting in the slowly growing warmth of my car.

The night was just starting to roll in and the sky was turning darker by the minute. Except for the clouds. The clouds glowed a brilliant orange against the sky. They looked as if they were creating bright stripes in a desperate bid to keep the darkness at bay for just a little bit longer. As I watched in awe, the bright orange clouds slowly got more dull as the darkness won at taking over the night.