the gaps in between.
a
single
missing
piece.
a field covered in snow
with a solitary red dot
spreading
bleeding crimson ink
a pinhole
becomes
a canyon
tears lead to deserts
silence causes a hurricane
chaos.
where has the past gone
lantern light extinguished
stumbling in the dark
falling through the floor
searching for sanity
as it all unwinds
a
n d
r e
b a s
k
a
p
a
r
t.
Incomplete
have you ever walked out
of your therapist's office
mid-way through
a conversation
because getting better
hurts like a mother______
or turned in
an exam in college
blank
with only your name
which is tarnished anyway
they tell you at the beginning
that it's going to be difficult
these things that make or break us
but I'd argue
anything can be erased
with a number two pencil
and some denial
Friendly Rivals
“I don’t mind being a third wheel Dirk.” Mitch replied. “If Doug and Cerissa find joy together, as well as Essie and Rick, then I can witness and be happy too.”
“That’s a nice way to look at it.” Dirk agreed. “After all I put my brother through with my mistakes, he deserves someone like Cerissa. I hope you find happiness again too Mitch, especially after all you’ve been through with Petunia. You deserve better man!”
“I appreciate that friend, but I can honestly say that even with everything going on with Petunia, I am happy whether I find someone new or not. And don’t be too hard on yourself. You’re young, and you’re a changed man Dirk. You have the rest of your life to find happiness, regardless of whether a relationship is part of that.”
“You know, you’re absolutely right!” Dirk replied with resolve. “I’ll start by giving my all for the rest of this volleyball game. Don’t hold back on me Mitch!”
“I won’t.” Mitch grinned. “May the best team win!”
Essie served the ball, and Cerissa received it, sending the ball towards Doug. Doug set to Mitch, and Mitch spiked it towards Dirk. Dirk dove in the sand and launched the ball into the air with his fist. Rick raced to the ball and set it to Essie. Essie sent an impressive cross shot over the net, but Doug was able to stop it from going out of bounds with an impressive dive. The ball was now airborne over Cerissa, who was right in front of the net.
“Mitch, get ready!” Cerissa cried out, preparing the set the ball to him.
Rick and Dirk raced in front of Mitch, matching his jump in preparation to block his inevitable attack. While all of this unfolded, Cerissa pushed the ball over the net with her left hand. The ball dropped into the sand with no opposition.
“A setter dump?” Rick laughed. “Well played Cerissa!”
To be continued....
timer
a half wrapped package
not yet open
a small timer peeking out
counting down.
how much time
do i have left
before i'm gone?
before i'm blown away
by a random act of
hatred?
who could have left this gift
waiting innocently on my steps
counting down even while i slept.
my life isn't done,
some things left unsaid
yet i can do nothing but watch
as the timer keeps going down.
i scratch at
loose paper
tearing it to bits.
i'm not ready to die.
this is a simple fix.
toss it aside, take it to the police
bury it in the woods
where it'll barely make a dent.
i'm not ready to die
so why can't i move?
maybe because i know
this package is from you.
my life is incomplete
but so is my heart
and if i had to choose
i'd rather die than lose you.
so take this poem
as a declaration
even though you've killed me
i love
Incomplete & Misplaced
For as long as I can remember, I have felt much like the proverbial 'fish out of water' - as though I did not belong in the time or place in which I was born and lived. I truly have felt incomplete and misplaced in this life. I can't really explain it other than to say that I have always gravitated to other things, people, and places with a depth and scope of feeling that is inherent in my soul, and yes, even in my body since I feel it to my core. It prevails and haunts me as it permeates every part of my life.
Most people would say that I am silly and am wishing for things that can't happen or I can't have, but it's so much more. There's a feeling that I should have born elsewhere. Everything has always felt a bit off. If you could feel as I do, you'd understand it all in the skip of a heartbeat, but since that can't possibly happen, we'll choose the wonder of words. I only hope I can portray the depth of what I feel through the beauty and power of the words written herein.
If one were to believe in reincarnation, then it seems possible that I was previously alive in Italy or England in the days of old. It’s as though there's a familiarity with those distant places that I sense and nearly breathe despite the fact that I have never been to either of the countries. How can something you don't know seem so familiar? It’s akin to déjà vu. I'm not precisely sure what it is or how it works, but for me, these places whose soil I have never had the privilege to lay my foot upon feel all too familiar in a multitude of ways. And even more so, it's all felt in a sense of something very old.
Yes, despite what one may think about thee things, I truly feel as though I've experienced a type of social shock for feeling as incomplete or misplaced as I do. I have an old soul that gravitates to older people, places, and things; it's those people and things with which I am the most comfortable. And it's also true that especially while gazing at a star-filled sky at night, I have never felt quite at home where I am. I love my family, so I am not ungrateful for what I have. But still, it doesn't alter the scope, the breath, and the depth of what I've always felt: things have never, ever felt complete for me, leading to a sense of misplacement. And the familiarity with and the inherent knowledge of places I have never been and things I have never seen shall always reverberate deep within until my dying breath.
