Feud
Dearest One,
You tell yourself you failed
But, let it go, that ship has sailed
Nineteen years ago, this very day
You meant the very vows you did say
You WILL love him till your very death
Just can no longer smell the boozed breath
To live authentic didn't break vow
It is time you show your daughter how
To live a life of kindness, serenity too
To be authentically, wholly you
Your head, this day, begs a second guess
This letter seeks to put that second-guessing to rest
Be at peace, you're doing the best you can
Know that he, flawed and beautiful, is just a man
Sleep well, know with each exhale
Letting go, you did not fail
Ooops!
So, you thought that I’d be easily forgotten. Au contraire! Now that I have your attention. Read this entire message. Don’t skip any slight details at all.
You destroyed the bed of roses in the garden. But you blamed it on the dog. Aie, aie, aie. No one may have known what you did. It might have been on accident. Now you have to go make sure that you inform the family on what actually happened. And the dog can be forgiven. As for you, you’ll have to ask the dog for forgiveness, and then take care of the new roses that your brother planted.
P.S. If any more flowers are destroyed, you will be taken to the flower court and charged for threatening the growth of the roses. Let us live in harmony. Please!
Hot mail
My arrival was an afterthought.
You rode in on a pair of ox. On your shoulders. Fur of silver fox. Wind blowing back your platinum locks.
Heaven help me. Serve up humble pie.
But I stuttered. Why?
So I send this little ditty. In the hopes that you take pity.
Maybe poke me? In the eye.
Just to pair are thoughts. Lest mine linger lost.
Do try. Design a line leading straight on thru. So I might know some truth. Of you. My Zorro Platiado paradox.
Signed.... Lost in Retrospect
Indelible Ink
Run, run, run, put me behind you
a line of ghosts leading
into the horizon
I am the mistake you made
I will not allow a retake
Run, run, run, put me behind you
I am etched forever on your skin
a vibrant red map of ‘it’s too late’
a dark foreboding shadow
following your trail in zig zags
Run, run, run, put me behind you
am I really the mistake
or are you the real illusion?
leading the way to no redemption
a two step tripping into the fog
Run, run, run, put me behind you
where no one will notice me
but you cannot escape
I remember what you did
you can never wash me off!
A Hug
Hello.
It's me. Your mistake. Your regret.
Why did you begin to fall in love with him? Why did you bring up something in the past about him and you? Why did you think of that night? That awful, awful night. You had begun to truly like someone, and it all started with a hug.
A hug. A hug that made you feel safe and comforted. It made you feel like you two were alone in space, bound to hug forever, like he could protect you. Like he would protect you. As if.
Why did you hate him? You felt hated and moved on. Then a friend stupidly asks a question that made you realize how much one night in the past could hurt you in future. You felt betrayed, even though it was half a year later and he had done nothing like that again.
You moved on, apparently, but now a part of that night will always stay with you, nagging you in the back of your mind. Telling you his words exactly.
You're weak.
You should be meaner, that's why you sit alone.
Maybe in the future you shouldn't hug someone who is taller than you.
You did not make me, I made you.
The mistakes we make are what make us and I am the worst one yet. My claws are in everything, baby. I'm not finished.
We tell ourselves that our undoings are what leads us to our true selves, what was meant to be this whole time. X failed so Y could succeed.
Maybe this is true, maybe you've convinced yourself enough to make it true. Maybe you will pick up and start again.
Everything will change but I will still be here in your darkest moments of doubt. See, I still happened.
I still happened and no amount of reconciliation will change me.
Yours truly.
Your Loving, Mistake
Mexico City, January 1st, 2018.
I'm a close friend of yours, yet you dare to call me a mistake. A well-hidden secret that God and your family would dishonor should it be revealed. You don't give it much importance, because deep down you know that it won't be relevant as long as you end sleeping alone at night. Your biggest fears feed me, and I know you are brave enough to go past the fright of ghosts and wood floors' crawling-in sounds. You are not scared of the darkness, but rather scared of never having someone to share said darkness with; your mind follows me, that glorious idea of hugging the warmth of dangerous arms no heavenly believer would see as pure. I haunt you when I intend to marvel you with true love, yet you hide me, as I become a threat to your own self-confidence towards ending this sad period of solitude. Yet, I am faithful, so I will wait, wondering around the streets of your neighbourhood until some hopeful day, I won't be regarded as an enemy anymore.
Remaining faithful to you,
Your Loving,
Mistake
Hey Buddy,
It is me. The reason that you do not sleep at night and you know it.
You know I have to write you. Darling, this is months ago and gosh, I know how tricky I am.
All the times I rip you apart, I laugh.
All the times I achieve to steal your sleep, I celebrate my glory.
But, now it is nearly New Years Eve and you have to move on.
It is tough to move on, but you cannot keep rereading this chapter over again.
You have to fall sometimes to be able to walk.
Have you ever seen a child walking from the first attempt on?
I have not, I would be scared of that kid who would excel from the beginning on.
Stay true to yourself. You failed, you let me into your life, because you tried.
You hate to lose, you hate me.
I am going to tell you secret, winners hate to lose. Even more than they love to win.
Let me be your teacher, not your enemy. Once you made me, you can do better.
Do it, I know that you can.
If not, I would not be here.
Cheers!