Her right hand on the steering wheel tightens, the knuckles strain against the skin, turning her normally cracked and weathered pink skin, smooth and white. Her left hand wants to make a fist, to join in solidarity with the other hand. Her mind talks her down, reasoning with her that he will notice if both hands grip the wheel tightly. With just the one hand tight, some of the frustration that she feels being stuck in this car with him, in this week with him will dissipate.

“He watches my every move for signs of distress, impatience, unhappiness, reading me like jagged lines on a heart monitor looking for those flatlines. If he can recognize the change he can pump me full of 100cc of 'what’s wrong?' 'How are you doing?' 'What’s going on in there?'He doesn’t realize I’m allergic to that kind of medicine, ha,” she humorously thinks to herself, “he should’ve read my chart. Sloppy medicining.” shaking her head back and forth in a tsk, tsk fashion, she relaxes her grip on the wheel. “He’s looking at a medical mal-practice suit here, where this reconciliation is concerned.”

Ingredients:

4 Publix bakery croissants

Iphone with email capability

4 slices Boars Head Horseradish cheese

Identification Card

Publix Spinach and Artichoke dip

Car keys

Publix Savory Chicken Salad

Wallet

Tositos Scoops

Brut Rose Champagne

Mint chocolate chip ice cream

Instructions:

Turn oven on to 400 degrees.

Grab car keys and wallet, race to Publix. While waiting in line to check out, begin writing email to best friend.

“Beatrice,

In my bedroom closet, there is a box with flower prints all over it. Inside the box are my journals, they encompass the last five years. Inside those pages, you will find how I tried unsuccessfully to navigate life. It documents the beginning of the end of my 12 year relationship with Stan: from a novice go at a cuckold relationship, misread coworker advances, to ultimately failing to get over a broken heart while still with someone else.”

Save progress so far on the email so that you can pay the kindly yet homly teenage boy behind the plastic shield. Hop into car and drive to Total Wine and More. While driving, begin talk to text email to Beatrice.

“Please edit them as best you can into something usable try to publish them so that other people dealing with these issues do not feel as alone as I did when I looked for my answers and help along the way there is another journal in my book case in my office a black mole skin with a blue rhino sticker on the cover include those into the mix start on April 23, 2020”

Save progress so far, Purchase 2 bottles of Billecart-Salmon Brut Rose Champagne from the cold cooler. While standing in line, edit talk to text email, adding punctuation.

Save progress so far, show ID to the forty something heavy set woman with frizzy hair behind a smaller plastic shield, Pay for champagne. Resume talk to text email:

“This part recover the Troy incident in my tiny four-way 48 into drug abuse it may help those in abusive relationships since I fell and we could users at this time”

Settle back into car, glance over talk to text, exclaim aloud,

“Good God! A four way? NO! F-O-R-A-Y! jeez. ‘we could users at this time(…)’ That doesn’t even make sense."

Begin typing carefully “in with an abuser” and resume talk to text email:

“You have always been my favorite most brutal editor I would not be able to trust these words to anyone else PS My last will and testament is in the gray Pendaflex in my office all my life insurance papers bank accounts 401(k) are in my desk drawer on the left hand side on the bottom stand is still a bit a factor because all of my money and my life insurance policy you will be a bit distracted emotional and forgetful I have a ton of money, please try to help him to collect it all I’ll be sending my sister the same post script I hope that Stan will put money aside for my niece and my nephew to go to college love Stacy”

After pulling in to the driveway, glance over talk to text bit…curse aloud

“Wtf Apple!? ‘A bit a factor’ for benefactor, and no punctuation, this sounds like the money is going to Beatrice”

Go inside of house with grocery and champagne.

Cut the 4 Croissants in half. Sandwich the cheese between the croissants. Place in oven. Set timer for 4 minutes.

Remove plastic covering from Spinach and Artichoke dip. Heat in the microwave based on the instructions on the side of the box.

Open Champange and pour a glass.

Begin editing letter to Best friend.

Remove croissants from the oven. Add the savory chicken salad. Place on the GoodWill purchased chip and dip dish that doubles as a cake display dish complete with cover when turned upside down. Open the bag of chips and Yay for small miracles they fit around the dip! Add the dip to the center.

After savoring a few glorious bites of croissant chicken salad sandwich and much of the Spinach and Artichoke dip with the chips, finish editing the email.

Click send.

A tiny box pops up on the screen.

There is no subject in the subject line…Would you still like to send email?

Subject: One Last Favor, Old Friend

Email Sent.

Sip on the champagne. Eat more croissants. Copy and Paste Beatrices edited email, change a few pronouns add an endearing message.

“Stan,

My last will and testament is in the gray Pendaflex in my office. All of my life insurance papers, bank accounts, 401k are in my desk drawer on the left hand side on the bottom. You are still the benefactor. You get all of my money and my life insurance policy. You will be a bit distracted, emotional, and forgetful. I have a ton of money, please try to collect it all. I will be sending my sister this same post script. I hope that you will put money aside for my niece and my nephew to go to college. The rest of the money is yours to do what you want with it. I would love for you to help support Beatrice as she tries to edit my memoirs. Allow me to live on in the words from those pages. Continue to tell your story. I always loved you stories.

Love,

Stacy”

Click send.

There is no subject in the subject line… Would you still like to send email?

“God damn it! I don’t have time for this!”

Subject: I always loved your stories!!!

Email sent.

Open up the freezer, remove the Mint Chocolate Chip Ice cream. Praise freezer for the last time for keeping ice cream in the perfect state of ready to eat frozenness. Remove plastic covering over icecream. Using a thin spoon begin scooping straight out of the tube with ease and into the mouth directly. Set spoon and Ice cream down. Begin last email. Paste Beatrice’s edited email, add personal touches, and a heart felt message.

“Mary,

My last will and testament is in the gray Pendaflex in my office. All of my life insurance papers, bank accounts, 401k are in my desk drawer on the left hand side on the bottom. Stan is still the benefactor. He gets all of my money and my life insurance policy. He will be a bit distracted, emotional, and forgetful. I have a ton of money, please try to help him to collect it all. I will be sending Beatrice this same post script. I have asked him to put money aside for Betty’s and Ralphie’s college funds.

You are the greatest sister anyone could hope for! Thank you for always playing mom when mom was too tired to try.

Love you always,

Stacy”

Click send.

Email Sent.

Pick up ice cream. Sip on Champagne. And Enjoy!

If you liked the recipe please let me know! Post comments below! Follow me @onehourtolive and tag any of your successes or fails #onehourtolive so I can see all the outcomes!

Looking down at the two thirds of the little green pill being handed to her by her new friend, Jack, Sherry contemplates. Jack encourages her by saying, "You said you wanted to wait til we new each other better, we've just been hands deep in your shit, so I'd say we know each other pretty damn good." Jack helped Sherry fix the wax ring around her toilet on his only day off. Sherry reluctantly takes the pill in her hand, holding on to it like a second choice wedding dress, or a security blanket she always losses.

Sherry continues to pack a bag for a few overnight stays at Jack's house, still clutching the pill. Jack is busy cleaning out her car and his truck as some form of male gratitude and team building that is beyond Sherry's conprehension.

At some point, as she is cleaning and straightening up the kitchen table that housed the remants of a alcohol filled punch gone right, she put a cup down on the table and smashed a corner of the pill unintentionally. When she picks up the heavy cup and sees her carelessness, she decides it's better to take it now than misplace the green jewel. She wants badly to remember tonight. Jack is taking her to her favorite restuarant. But she also wants that wonderful floating feeling when the stars, alcohol, and this magical green fairy come together. She is determined to remember tonight. She'll just drink less.

Now that she took the pill, the clock is ticking, she has to finish packing and get on the road to the resturant so that she can enjoy her day before she starts to forget her day. She is unsure when that moment will happen but she knows time is a factor.

Jack wants to stop at the car wash, wash his truck, and he'll pay to wash her car. Sherry keeps moving, agreeing, let's go because feelings and thoughts are going to start blending, no time for arguing. Sherry fills up a roadie for her and him, she packs up her dog in her car and they are on their way.

Sherry wonders as she is sitting in front of the automatic car wash computer screen, "What the hell does a towel exchange mean?" With no time to lose and fewer brain cells to mustard up the effort to ask an attendant, she agrees to the towel exchange, pays the extra $4 and drives on through the car wash on auto-pilot.

In her growing haze, she finds Jack's truck and parks next to it. He quickly vaccums out her car. He makes fun of her for getting the towel deal. She hides it away hoping upon exiting the car wash the "exchange" part of this transaction will be made clear.

Evaluating her present self, she is feeling with it, she has this, she will remember tonight. She even puts the vacuum back on the slot even though Jack let it fall to the floor. She tells herself, she is in a good spot. She sips more drinks from her roadie through the metal straw as she follows Jack home.

She gets to Jack's house, drops of the dog and stuff. She deliberatly puts her id and credit card in her change purse made from recycled material that says, Change is Good with a little pink piggy on both sides. She is going to pay for her meal or some of it or be prepared to, she is bringing her money and her phone, maybe a jacket because she gets cold.

Now the next morning, Sherry is slow to start as she tries to piece together the evening. Jack assures her he thought she had a blast and he had no idea she was wasted. She remembers walking into the restuarant, the clanking of glasses, giving her opinion on the proper way to take saki bombs. After that she remembers seeing three different types of ice creams in front of her to try. She remembers sitting in Jack's truck and ever so carefully taking the lid off of her to-go ice cream. She remembers being put to bed by Jack and him saying he will join her later. But she doesn't remember the taste of anything.

"Damn it!" Sherry thinks to herself. "You got so messed up you don't even remember eating something you love to eat. And now, you can't eat it again. Just because you don't remember it doesn't mean the calories didn't happen. That was your one opportunity. Way to go"

She does get out of bed and moves to the couch. Snuggled on the couch in her heated blanket, watching The Good Place on repeat on Netflix, she waits to wake up more fully. Finally, after deciding she will not treat herself to the meal she doesn't remember from last night nor will she do any chores, she will clean out her purse, there by puting her life back together. It is then and only then, that she discovers, her id and her credit card are missing along with the cute pink change purse that says Change is Good. She has no idea where it is or where she lost it.