There’s this god awful smell

And it’s coming from inside

I think I’m rotten at the core

Rotten as can be

I slit a vein just to know

What’s living inside

Bubbling to the surface all I found

Was a wave of sewage pouring out of me

Rotten, broken, sick

There’s nothing I can do

Sitting with myself

In a cage of flesh and bone

There’s only one escape

I slit a vein and wait

I let all the garbage seep away

But all I am is this stink inside

If you drain it all away you’ll find

Nothing left behind

If I can find a way

A way out of this place

I’d find my home in hell

A rotting filthy putrid place

It’s the hole where I belong

So dying here so fucking slow

I know

There’s nothing left behind

Like spiders nesting beneath the skin

Her words floated around me

With tattered eyes and red swollen lips

Venom lived in her blood

And as she softly bled

She painted white roses red

Waterfalls fell from her cobalt eyes

My Crimson Queen's cheeks once so bright

Now drained into white rose sheets

As her wrist poured venom

She softly died

And painted the castle red

If I could fly

I'd traverse the Pacific

Bundle up against the cold

Hungry winds

So not an inch of warm

Seeps through

If I could fly

I'd never land

Not for food or rest

Well

Maybe for a bathroom break

Or two

But no

If I could fly

I'd move so fast

With a trail of supersonic boom

Slammed behind

I'd pack in all my joy

My laughs and hope

And I'd bring them all

To you

There was something funny about all this. About being stabbed in the back. With a pencil no less. I mean, it didn't hurt, not too back at least. But dang. I didn't see it coming. One minute we were laughing, just stumbling to the convenience store in a late-night conquest for more Bud Lights, watching the sallow green grass bend in the breeze. The party of strangers at my house was still booming with music I didn't enjoy, but I enjoyed you. Our journey. A little escape from social charades. I grinned and you grinned too. That's about when you stabbed me. The lead pinched through my old cotton T, breaking into the soft skin stretched over my spine. I jumped, not with pain, but shock and I peered at you with new eyes. I'd been played. You were no friend. Just another guy with a padlocked soul. Playing social charades. And I a spent candle with the wick snapped away.

The Skies ooze joy

And it's hot

Acid really

It falls

Indiscritant in murder

In burning

The roofs

We built to protect

Turned to kindling

Fuel to an element

We wish just kept us

Warm

In retaliation

The Earth

Heaves open its

Maw

Where the ocean were

Spit

Rivers were

Sweat

And mountains were

Pimples

It swallows up the Sky

Eats up the joy

And in return

We humans

Are blessed with

Sorrow

We are doused in

Cold

And laugh with no sun

To bring us

Tomorrow

Listen,

I've looked everywhere

In the TV

Our favorite shows

In your room

Where dust just

Grows

In our photos

Our faces locked

In toothy smiles

Safety off

On that old joy

Now look here

Your bed is made

No one sleeps there

Anymore

I do not tread

I do not linger

Just peak in

And run away

Where the fuck

Did you go?

And what the hell

Do I do

Now?

You stole the joy

Straight from

My heart

Why do I still love you

When we're

Apart

Whatever you do

Don’t Look Back

There’s a mirror behind you

And it’s black

It’s heavy

And stained with soot

Whatever you do

Look ahead

It’s clear

Well, mostly

But it’s empty of fire

Empty of ash

“But it’s filled with nothing!”

I cry out

Against my narrator

My god

My author

My lonesome companion

Who I do not know

And she replies

That’s right

That’s why

You have strong hands

A muscular back

Made for work

A heart of carbon

Flexible and a conductor

Of energy abound

So build

Whatever the hell

You want

I am not

Your god

I will set your house on fire

Before I'm forced to live in it

With you

I will burn your life

Away

Your confidence

Your hope

Before you can kill mine

I will set your world

Into a fire tornado

You know

Like the ones we now see

On TV

I will destroy myself

Before you hurt me

But you just smile

And say

"Okay,

I'll do the dishes tonight."

I open my fist

And you take my hand

And you know what

I'd take it all back

If you do the dishes

Every night

Please?

Do it

I deserve it

This heaven above

Is a penthouse

A rich party

I was not invited

Even if I'm asked

I will not go

Because I know

Where I belong