Happy Gloom
Pacing through, the morning dew
Like clouds my eyes, it rained
Empty skies, in violet blue
My memories, slowly drained
Like a kid, in cries
I Blink
Souls, demise
I sink
Like a cry, to the sky
Like a dime, to the crime
Like a Cliche, you cant deny
Like a Cure, to claim
In Sorrow
Broken heart in rime, raging thoughts revive
In Morrow
Like a rhyme, I will survive
All that I could do...
‘Hello, I’m Stacie, a journalist from the Premier weekly, can you tell me what happened?’
‘......... No ...’
Nurse: ′ You should not be here, journalist, the guy needs to rest’
‘I’m sorry to disturb you at this condition, but you were the sole survivor, and if you could tell me’
Nurse: ′ Can you please leave...′
‘Oh, okay, sorry, i’d better leave...’
′ It was a lovely day, stacie, a very bright sunny day with spring clouds showering here and there.’
Take your seat.
Stacie sat down silently.
‘I went with my family to the carnival, my wife, my kid Dorien and our dog Valerie’, Gasp , ′ We were so happy, a new place, a new way of life, a better school for my boy, our lives ere just gonna get better.′
‘And then I heard a gun shot, should have been a bullet passing by my left ear. It just made me deaf, it was so powerful, so chaotic, i just fell, and my wife grabbed me, we were on our knees by then’
‘Valerie got frightened, she just fled, the poor dog.’
‘My boy Dorien, he just ran after Valerie’
‘A fleeting shot of gunfires, and my boy, my Dorien, he just fell, i wanted to believe he only got shot in the leg, but, but no, he fell’
′ Still unable to recover from these shocks, i crawled to my kid, held him to my heart, hoping a miracle would happen, hoping that he could hear my heartbeat, hoping that he could hear and wake up, but, but no...’
‘Words failed me’ ‘the world failed me’
′ and i looked to my side, and she wasn’t there’
′ I turned myself back to look at her, to get to her’
‘and , and, and she was there standing, I could not see even a single thought reflecting of her face. She just stood there blatantly. It was like someone took the love out of her, such coldness’
‘I could not hear anything, couldn’t see anything but her, and she fell to her side, time slowed, i watched her fall, it was so painful to look but it didnt’t stop, she was falling, it was like, like, like a whole life time, and she was there still falling’
‘And she hit the ground, the mob was gone, the gun shots were over, and everyone was murdered, i held her on my lap, my tears washed the dirt away from her face’
‘I cried so bad, i couldn’t cry anymore, i was drained of water, filled with extreme grief’
‘Valerie, she crawled to me, a moment of break i wanted,but, she just, fell right on my side’
‘my family was gone’
‘my family as gone, Stacie’
‘and here you are, to report this to your company, that’s only focussed on making money as a corporate, only making money of people’s pain and pleasures’
‘I’m sorry, sir, i don’t know, i just got nothing to tell you, you know, i got... , i gott’
‘Sir, are you all right, sir , can you hear me, nurse, nurse’
Nurse: What happened, what’s happening, oh my god, doctor, doctorrrr.....
Tick Tock Tick Tock Tick toooooccck....
Yes, but NOOOooo...
Swish, as I fell on the bed
Of an independant community of water drops
Swiftly yet smoothly it engulfed
Pulling me down and deep unto its heart
My aura of a loving warmth
Hugged by a freezing smooch
As a thousand hands of liquid
pulled me closer
A healing light from the heavens
pulled me back and further.
SHIT, is that my body drowning.
Big and bigger
The alarms gone, Sun is on and there you are lazy , lazy trying to find reasons to do what you should, hasty in finding excuses. You are a grown up, you are aware, you know what is wrong with you, and how it can be repented . Yet, there you are watching the battle beween reasons to work and excuses to not.
But you have not been sleeping your days off, you are doing something. Watching something, buying something, literally being responsive to the ones that really work, but you, not you, you dont work do you.
If you can think of reasons to do something, that doesn't help you grow. Why cant you feel a reason to help you work for what you love, maybe is it a little failure, not able to find your people who appreciate your unique way. You dont work on people to expect good response, you work on yourself.
Dont let the big world of people make you feel small, let that bigger insides of you out, play wild. Play heartful.
When you have become truly what you are supposed to, then people could do nothing but appreciate. Earn that magnificience.
Expanding...
It was black, pitch black, no, no it was dark, i could see things moving but couldn't perceive anything. Stranded, floating, with nothing to grasp or hold onto for life. I could feel my heart and head pounding, but couldn't feel their existence. I tried to touch them, feel myself, trying to be aware of the self on the least, but i didn't even know where my hands were, or if it even existed.
A shrieking sound of synth fading, something was there. So, bright. Glowing so mighty, like that the legions of gods themselves had come down to savvy save the saviour, from their heavenly abode. The glow expanded as darkness imploded. The stream of light flowed in all that it could. Just about time, i realized that i was a ball of light glowing. My arms, white streams of light, touched everything in its path, left a mark on everything it touched, left a mark that itself glows and expands into multiple branches of light flowing into all. Bright light flourished, until all that i could see was light.
Another sweet sharp grumble, fiery black flames smoked out, slowly advancing and consuming light, consuming, neutralizing and balancing light. As light flowed from the darkness , darkness now flows out of light. As light formed itself out of the dark nothingness, light fumed bright with darkness. Swirling tempest, blinding light, perceivable darkness, and in the centre i was.
Finally, at balance with the light and darkness within. a balance between logic and emotions, between my head and heart. And in this very moment, I was there at balance with myself and all that surrounds.
Ever living in the never ending moment of peace.