Windless sail
In-laws, out-laws seem the same. My monster-in-law has chosen not to spend anytime with our little family of 4 for the last 2.5 years. Yes partly because of Covid-1, partly because my husband works in a large retail store. In the beginning we were really cautious about everything to the point we even put our outside help in hold. My husband worked and I took care of our 2 kids with multiple disabilities And did virtual schooling for 1 of our kids. Even though we were not around anyone else my in-laws, spoken from my mother-in-law’s mouth, she wasn’t coming around because her son, my husband, worked in the large retail. My parents are both gone. My mom passed away 10 years ago this October and my dad’s been gone 5 years ago yesterday. This Lack of contact has made holidays & birthdays interesting and hard. When you have kids with disabilities holidays can be hard anyway. But now factor in the fact that there’s no family. Our kids miss out on so much, so many experiences, and so much family. So fast forward many months to 2 weeks ago, my in-laws have guests from out of state staying at their home spending 4 days with them. We live maybe 20 minutes from them. Then comes this weekend and they plan to have a house full of people for Easter. But guess who they never even asked? Me and the kids were home like every other day of the year. My husband worked all day like he does routinely weekly. Am I bitter? Maybe. Do I now want to chat with her right now? Definitely not. does she ever think she says or does anything wrong? Never. I’ve always said the people that are closest to you, you expect more from Those are the ones that knock the wind out of your sail. Strangers don’t have that power. Yet we give those closest that power. If you’re a lucky one that have marvelous in-laws you can count your blessings.
Downward spiral
My parents are gone. My mom ten years ago and my father 5 years now. Still feels like yesterday. But just two years ago the state shutdown. So many questions, so many unanswered or unanswerable questions daily. We shutdown our home too. Don’t suppose that seems so different to what most people did except at our house we have two children with disabilities. So we had nursing coming to help care for our son. But with the world shutting down…we made the choice to put nursing on hold. Which means total care for two dependent children with disabilities landed on me. My husband work through the isolation period. He works for a large department store and his job was determined to be necessary. So every morning I got up and went through the motions. Most days I didn’t get dressed. Most days I didn’t run a brush through my hair. Most mornings I had to fight myself to get up in the morning & get out of bed. For 6 months I was exhausted. I asked my mother in law why she didn’t visit because her son worked at the department store. Mind you he works in the backroom and is not around people but ok?!? How do you not take offense? I had to hang up. I was falling deeper in a state of survival and I wasn’t so sure I wanted to survive…two years later I still have not seen my mother in law. I talk to her rarely. I miss my mom so much. But same thing daily and try to carry on in this hole.