unbreakable . in the things that you make me feel

( hard to name

but felt with every little part of me )

even when these erratic heartbeats of mine

are made entirely

of paper-thin glass,

even then, I would shatter it into a million and one

fragmented pieces of hope,

turning it into softly falling snow

( the calm of a lost meadow ) under my winter sun

that golden glow touching the fragile drums

hidden under my chest

somehow, you can always hear them

sensing the rhythm, sensing the strength I seem to forget

how do you do that,

my beautiful soul?

moja piękna duszo

hope.

it’s powerful,

without it,

we would give up,

give in,

and stop fighting.

it’s empowering.

it’s like the one source of light

that shatters the darkness

which chokes and suffocates us.

it comforts.

like warm arms

wrapped around you

while paralysing lightning strikes

and deafening thunder claps

with raindrops pouring from heaven.

the world can go to hell,

but as long as you have hope,

you don’t have to go to hell with it.

10.12.2020

Hope, a plant you leave accidentally on purpose without water for weeks that stays as green as it was the last time you showed it compassion.

Hope, pre treating your favorite knit sweater knowing the coffee won't budge.

Hope, a loyal furry friend waiting expectantly at the door for your return the moment you leave.

Hope, a funny thing. Without warrant but still a necessity for survival.

Hope, an irreversible conditioning of the universe, perhaps our most powerful tool for existing.

Hope, humanity's bargaining chip for a second chance.

Hope is the breath you take.

But...

Faith is the oxygen you need to breathe.

Stand up.

Wipe the tears.

Never mind the stains.

Take a step.

Stumble.

Fall.

Take a breath.

Stand.

Step.

Fall.

I still remember how to walk, don't I?

Then I'll make it.

Hope is something that feels just out of reach

Yet it's supossed to make my life complete

It's something I'm yearing to feel

Something that makes life feel a little more real

I'm told that it is the greatest of feelings

Something that gives life meaning

The thing that keeps me from the ledge

An emotion to keep the demons in my head

A thought to keep my insecurities at bay

A flicker of flame on my darkest days

How I wish to feel hope

maybe then I can use it to cut this rope...