Call me odd.

Call me strange.

But I am in a constant state of prayer always.

You know those people who are always annoyingly on the phone (bluetooth or facetime) with a friend or family member all loud in the checkout of the local shop? Well, that's me...

with God...

Only, a little less loud.

I thank Him for everything from the big bold blessings like this wonderful world we live in, the everyday blessings like breath, food, and shelter, and the small things like the people who made the aglets on my sneakers. I will look at a house and ask Him to bless the hands of the people who worked to build everything from the foundation to the bricks to the fence and the windowpanes. Even the folks who recently cut the grass and the handbill folks who last knocked upon the door and left junk mail at the residence.

When I say grace, I not only thank Him for the meal itself, but also for everyone who helped to make it possible- from farm to table, so to speak. This also includes any animals. Even the birds who ate the seeds from one fruit and pooped them out elsewhere to create the plant that grew into the tree that bore the delectable treat I now have the pleasure of consuming.

I not only thank Him for these people and things. I ask Him to bless them. Whether they're still here in the land of the living (bless them, their families, their endeavors, etc.) or even if they've passed on yet (bless their souls).

When I'm watching TV, best believe I'm thanking God for everyone listed on the credits and even those who were overlooked. I'm asking Him to bless everyone who's had anything remotely even to do with the matter.

I ask Him to bless each person who's ever come in contact with me- whether I know it or not, and whether they know it or not.

I ask Him to bless you and everyone else on obscure corners of the internet who happen upon my work, be it writing, art, or even things they aren't even aware I had a hand in.

I ask Him to bless everyone I've ever crossed paths with in my life, and everyone I will ever cross paths with in the future (in person and online) and I thank Him for them.

For them all.

For it all.

And, as for my life,

for my world,

nothing will change.

Because every day,

every moment,

every waking breath,

I am in a constant state of prayer

and thanks

to my God

...for everything.

got on a plane

yesterday

on time departure

no delays

girl next to me

shaking violently

with anxiety

going just from Denver

to LA

when we touched down

I thanked God quietly

whether it’s luck or fate

she knew it wasn’t guaranteed

surviving the landing

surviving our own insecurities

I'd wake up with absolutely nothing, then.

In fact, I suppose I'd wake up not alive, seeing as I didn't send any gratitude for my life either.

I'm not a believer, you see.

Which begs the question; if God truly is, I do wonder which faction of the Christians would be right.

Would I be allowed into heaven or go to hell for knowing about the religion and choosing to have no ties to it?

I was a Christian some years back, not up to a decade ago so I'm not unfamiliar with the devotion or faith.

I had it once.

But I would like to believe that I wouldn't simply be condemned, unlike what some might believe.

We each have out own assumptions but I think God has spent a lot of time thinking and repenting some of his choice Old Testament behaviour (see: the parts where he floods the entire Earth or orders Saul to procure the death of an entire tribe/group/whatever etc)

The man is changed, we are made in his own image and just like him we all evolve and grow and that makes all the difference

I have a feeling he won't give much of a damn about whether everyone on Earth believes or not, seeing as his religion came to my own continent and country through bloodshed, colonialism, manipulation and control

He's more likely to be exhausted at what so many of his followers say and do in his name to be pissed off at anyone for leaving his religion.

But that's just an assumption and a hope that he's changed for the better.

Guess we'll find out tomorrow :)