I am going to put this pin on today and walk outside being proud of myself in the world for the trans gay bean I am.

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Or I’m going to sit on the floor and sob over [insert 48 different fandom specific things here] for the next three hours while I eat this bowl of cold ramen and probably threaten to delete my best friend’s kneecaps. And then eat more ramen. Then it’s fanfic time. Then crying over my lack of ownership of any beanies and not enough flannel shirts (I have at least 12 of them). Then cry over my lack of boyfriend. Then more kneecap deletion. Then more [insert fandom]. Then probably dissociate from reality for a couple hours. Then more ramen. Then more fanfic. Then more-

I’m just a gay bean that just wants my cup of ramen to be warm, a beanie or ten, and a boyfriend. Please. That’s all I ask.

Lena was moments away from being burned alive.

Mia had actually done it.

She'd lit the match.

She’d thrown it into the puddle of gasoline leaking from the pipe, screaming arson, chanting about how much she wanted to watch this place burn.

How much she wanted to burn.

“We're going to die in here,” Lena whispered, struggling to keep her voice monotone as she continued to stare directly into the other girl's deep brown eyes. They weren't cold anymore-not like before. They were blazing, filled with an indescribable passion, and she felt herself being drawn closer and closer until they were almost touching.

Lena could feel her breath on her face.

“Probably,” Mia said.

And that was that.

Those were the last words they ever said to one another.

As they inched closer and closer together, it was as if their minds were melding, melting, into one.

Neither of their gazes ever wavered.

‘What if we were friends for the night?’ Lena had asked herself earlier.

‘What if I wasn't the school's reject and she wasn't the cruel, pretentious ice-queen that everyone made us out to be?’

'What if we were the same?'

She'd never thought someone like Mia Singh could even get angry because Mia was perfect.

She passed every test, went to every student council meeting and had the highest grades in their entire class.

Lena had thought she was soaring, but it turns out they were one and the same.

They'd been drowning.

And now, they were both burning.

Lena felt the flames catch onto her skirt, but she couldn't bring herself to care.

She didn't want to admit it to herself, but she wanted to burn too.

Somehow, Mia already knew that. Lena didn't need to tell her.

‘What if we could be more than friends for a night?’

Mia pressed their foreheads together and suddenly amidst the flames, Lena felt hot.

She was burning her from the inside out and Lena wanted her to.

She wanted her to, so badly.

She wanted her.

She wanted-

Suddenly the steel gray doors of the basement storage room burst open and in came a horde of men in uniforms shouting orders at one another and snatching them away from the flames.

Lena hacked smoke out of her lungs and shook all the of the soot from her hair, gulping up the fresh night air.

One of the firefighters immediately asked them if they were okay.

He told them that his department had gotten an alert that to their school's core temperature had risen to unprecedented amounts and that he and his squad had driven over as fast as they could.

He told them he was sorry the department hadn't gotten to us sooner and asked them how the fire started in the first place.

She let Mia do the talking.

She let the girl craft a wonderful tale about how the pipes had burst and how Lena's cigarettes had accidentally triggered the fire.

The chief gave Lena a look of disappointment but not surprise.

He'd taken one look at the gauges in her ears, her greasy, knotted hair and her scrawny bony figure, and decided he could trust Mia's story because apparently pretty girls with glasses can’t lie. He kept asking Mia more questions and then asked another firefighter to call their parents.

Lena's mother didn't pick up until the 5th call.

She asked the firefighter to drive her daughter home because she was sleeping and they’d all just interrupted her.

God forbid anyone interrupts her beauty rest.

Mia's parents came mere moments after getting the call.

They looked livid. Her father questioned every single firefighter in sight while her mother criticized the school, calling it a place unfit and wildly dangerous for the likes of her daughter.

That made Lena smile a bit.

If only she knew how dangerous Mia truly was.

Her mother gave Lena a fleeting glance, looking at her as if she were some stain on the bottom of her shoe.

She was used to it.

Before being hauled off into her parents' car Mia gave Lena one last look.

Her eyes were cold again, just like they had been before the fire.

‘What if we could-’

That didn’t matter.

They were strangers once more.

James wishes he knew what they were.

They held each other every night, the four gray walls of their dorm room at Briarwood Prep, the only which had seen it. They shared "I love you's." They shared dreams.

In his head, James saw a future: he saw himself and Chris in some great city, New York or Paris, unafraid to just be themselves. The crowd too full to care. But he began to doubt if Chris saw that same future.

He did not see the quiet way James's heart broke when he suggested that he start "dating" Nancy Callahan. "It's not real." He insisted. But it's 1965. And they're seventeen years old. And what people think still matters.

Chris had become paranoid, when his younger brother began asking questions as to the nature of their relationship. Perhaps bringing James to Thanksgiving was a mistake, a hidden line that took it all too far.

"It's not real." Chris said. "It doesn't change how I feel about you."

But in that dance hall, looking on as Nancy and Chris whisper and laugh and dance too closely, it feels real enough to James. He looks after them, joined by Chris's commiserating brother, who's love for Nancy mirrors his for Chris.

He looks at them--the perfect couple. The star basketball player and the studious book worm. And he saw that future too. The marriage, the kids, the suburban home, the easy life that Chris could have.

Long enough, he stares until his heart can't handle the burden. Briskly, he stands from his table of broken hearts and escapes outside the hall.

A slow tune begins to play, an old Broadway ballad. On the Town if James can recall:

Where's all the time gone to?

Haven't done half the things I want to.

Oh well, we'll catch up some other time.

James begins to cry, because the lyrics feel all too real. He leans himself against a strong oak tree and lets his eyes flutter closed.

He wishes he did not see Chris and Nancy arm and arm when he did.

His eyes fly open as a strong hand grips his shoulder. He turns to see Chris, his Chris, with love and sadness in his eyes.

He does not speak a word, but James can hold it in no more. "I know you said it wasn't real. But it hurts. Seeing you with her."

For a moment Chris is confused, as if he'd forgotten Nancy's very existence. And then his face twists into a mysterious sadness that only he could understand. Lightly, Chris grabs the sides of James face, pulling him in until their heads touched ever so lightly.

James closed his eyes once more. Allowed himself to breathe Chris in; his perfumed scent, his steady heartbeat, as if this was the last time.

"Please." Chris begs, truly begs. James had never heard such pleading in his voice. "Just hold on a little bit longer."

James starts to sob, though he wills himself not to, for fear of looking weak. "I don't know if I can." he chokes out.

"Once we graduate, we disappear. We can be anyone we want." Chris says, and James looks up, eyes filled with sudden wonder. Because this is the first time Chris had mentioned that future at all. And in that brief glimpse, James could see--the love, the passion, the dreams the two could share. And it was beautiful. And it was worth holding on to.

Just when the fun is starting

Comes the time for parting

But let's be glad for what we had

And what's to come

James had almost forgotten the music, lightly dancing in the spring wind. Chris holds out an open hand. An invitation, and a promise.

"Dance with me?"he asks. And James looks around in awe, because the world was all around them. The starry sky, the grassy campus, the dance hall full of life, only a breath away.

"Here?" he asks, unsure he heard the words. Perhaps he merely dreamed them. Because they were far from those four gray walls and so close to normal it hurt.

"Right here." Chris confirms. "Right now."

And James wrapped himself around the man he loves for all his might, because he did not know when this moment would end. And they swayed, two souls in the empty night. And perhaps that beautiful future would not be or could not be. But right here, right now they were perfect. And that was everything.

And lightly that tuned continued. That beautiful sad tune that had somehow become theirs.

There's so much more embracing

Still to be had, but time is racing

Oh well, we'll catch up some other time.

"Dance with me," Iago said, holding his hand out.

Jule looked at him with a face, hesitating. Iago's face fell at the reaction and stopped.

"I'm sorry. I made you uncomfortable."

"No, I just... I'm sorry..."

Jule turned and ran through the double doors, leaving Iago standing there alone. He followed to see his date slumped between the doors of the bathroom, sobbing.

"Jule, what's wrong?" he asked, standing a safe distance away.

"I don't know which fucking bathroom to go in!"

"What are you talking about?"

"I lied when we met, okay? I'm not trans. I'm not a woman. I don't want to be a boy. I'm fucking confused, okay?"

"That's okay," Iago said.

"No it isn't! My whole existence is fucking wrong and everyone knows it."

Tears were hitting the floor now. Iago, now sitting a foot or so away, took Jule's hand. "I understand how that feels."

"What the fuck are you talking about? You can't understand this unless you're going through it."

"This is the first school I've ever been to. I'm technically not alive. My parents were some badass bank robbers and I guess they just had me in their backseat and kept going. When they went down, they told me to go down to some house with this note and the people just took me and made me do all of this. But it doesn't feel right, you know? I used to be helping break safes and learning how to pickpocket people without them knowing. I still do it sometimes. It's just a habit. I mean, I'm not going through not knowing my body but this world that I'm supposed to be in isn't me and now I can't really leave."

"You don't exist?"

"I mean, I do now but I didn't for the first seventeen years or so."

"You're seventeen?"

"Yeah, that's what they say. I only really know my birthday because my parents would always do a special job for it. We didn't do cake or balloons or any of that. Well, we did once but that was just for a job."

"That's badass."

"Not to me. It's just life. All these action movies look like child's play sometimes."

Jule laughed at the floor. "So what happens now?"

"Whatever you want. That's the best thing I was ever taught. Go with the flow. You know how I feel about you. And whether you want to be with me or someone else, you've got a friend for life."

Teary-eyed, Jule pulled Iago into a tight hug. Iago smiled and kissed Jule's head.

"Want to go back to prom now?"

"Why would I want to? It was boring anyway."

Iago smiled and held Jule's hand. "I can at least walk you out."

"That would be nice."

As they walked down the hallway, Jule spoke up again. "So, your name isn't really Iago?"

"No, it is. Othello was my mom's favorite play. She had a thing for Iago. She said he was the best villain she'd ever read. Liked his charisma."

"She sure missed the mark with you, huh?"

"She definitely did. But I barely heard my first name."

"What did they call you? Agent 007?"

"We were bank robbers, not spies." Iago chuckled.

"So, what was it?"

"Racecar."

"Racecar?"

"Yeah, my dad had a thing for palindromic names. I would've had a sister named Hannah."

"Sisters are overrated."

"Oh yeah? You have a sister?"

"Correction, I have five sisters. My mom likes to joke that I may be going through whatever I'm going through but I'm still the most low maintenance of her kids."

"At least she's supportive."

"Yeah, my parents had a friend that committed suicide a year before I was born and she was always understanding. That's my namesake. And when I told them, they said she taught them to always be understanding so they'll ride this rollercoaster with me."

"That's nice. Your sisters don't say stuff about it?"

"Of course not. That's not even hitting below the belt. That's shooting someone in the head during a petty argument. We love each other. No matter how mad they get, they never say anything bad about who I am or call me names or anything. Hell, my six-year-old sister just punched another kid who was talking shit about me."

Audrey walked past with a face and giggled to her friends. Iago looked at the ground. "Must be nice. My family is always throwing this shit at me. Let something go missing and it's WWIII in that bitch."

"That's not family. That's just mean. Family is supposed to love you no matter what."

"Fat chance."

They were outside now, standing in front of Jule's pickup truck.

"You going home now too?"

"No. I mean, I don't want to but even if I did, I can't leave without Audrey and Jackson."

"Would they notice if you left without them? I mean, I can give you a lift if you want."

"Only if you drive slow. I'm in no hurry to get home."

"Don't worry. I'll drive at a snail's pace."

"Good." Iago climbed in.

Jule started the car and drove down the street. Iago sat quietly in the passenger seat, playing with a quarter.

"So, have you ever been to Paris before?"

"I mean yeah, a couple- Oh, you mean here. No, this is my first time."

"Maybe I can show you the tower. Though I love the movie theater. My sister works there and can get us some free popcorn."

"I'd love that," Iago said with a smile.

Mariel was dead tired. She dropped her grocery bags on the dingy apartment floor and flicked on the light. It flickered. She slumped onto the counter and sighed.

“Party at Risha’s. 9” Mariel saw the text light up her old cracked screen. Alissa, her best friends from kindergarten was always invited to parties and sometimes Mariel tagged along. Between her work and nearly suffocating deadlines of rent and assignments, Mariel had lost any excitement she once had at the idea of a party. And Risha’a parties were so extravagant. His mansion fit dozens of people, drinks and so many rooms you could get lost.

“Mariel!” She jumped. Someone banged on her door again.

She picked herself off the counter, her legs complaining as she opened the door. Perfect. Her ex.

She stared at him level eyed. Parker, with his lanky form and tall hair, looked over her shoulder. No eye contact.

“What?” Mariel asked flatly. The breakup between them, while one of Mariel’s better ones, wasn’t something she wanted to deal with now.

“Um, well, Knives Out is playing at Bloor - wanna go?” Bloor had been one of their favourite places to sneak into. Left-hand balcony seats where you could make out without anyone seeing.

Mariel and Parker had agreed to stay friends and make an effort, but Marile couldn’t imagine trying to suffer between awkward conversation and sitting in seats next to where they had their first kiss.

“Actually, I have a party tonight,” Mariel said on a whim.

“Oh.” Parker stood in the doorway.

No way was she inviting him. “I’m going with Alissa,” Mariel added.

“Okay. I’ll see you around then.” Parker turned away faster then Mariel had ever seen him move and started downstairs.

“Parker. Thanks for the invite though.” Mariel called out half-heartedly. He was trying, more than her, after all.

Mariel stepped into Risha’s party, the floor already vibrating from the music and the lights set to dim. Why was she here again?

“Mar! I’m so happy you came.” Alissa smiled warmly. In ripped jeans, crop top and slicked backed bob, Alissa looked nothing short of stunning. On the other side, Mariel had only brushed her hair and thrown on a black hoodie overtop her jean shorts.

“Yeah, I’m so tired but missed you.” Mariel grabbed a cup of punch. Eventually, she drifted away from Alissa and skirted the outsides of the party. Mingling with old classmates and new people whose name she instantly forgot, Mariel felt her stress melt away. At least for the night.

“Hey, that’s my cup.” Mariel barely heard a girl over her thoughts and the music. Abruptly a girl lifted the red cup out of Mariel’s hand and gulped back the contents in one shot.

“Oh, well, it is definitely now.” Mariel went back to trying to find her cup in the sea of them on the grey table. She gave up in vain.

“I’m Kai.” The girl stuck out her hand. Mariel shook it. “I’m Mariel.”

“Let me get you another drink.” Kai smiled briefly and then darted into the crowd, leaving Mariel to stand there awkwardly.

“Here. I honestly couldn’t tell you what it was. It’s from the bowl.” Kai pushed it at her hands. Mariel took her and out of politeness sipped. It was too bitter but also too sweet at the same time.

“So what brings you here?” Kai looked out into the crowd. Her eyes glistened almost mischievously as if she knew something they didn’t.

“My friend.” Mariel gestured to the crowd, where she had last seen Alissa maybe an hour ago.

“Same. Not really a party person, but well, here I am.” Kai laughed.

“I got you.” Mariel felt their conversation fall into silence. She glanced at Kai, who seemed undisturbed. Gold hoops, black flowing top, short hair. She was cute. Kai looked back at her and raised an eyebrow.

“Let’s dance.”

Kai dropped her red cup on the grey table and swept herself into the floor. She glanced back at Mariel and threw her hands in the air. Mariel felt herself also setting down her cup and walking over to the dance floor. In the centre of the crowd, the dance floor felt like a club. Mariel swayed to the music, watching Kai’s smooth moves. A song played, another player and another, until Mariel lost track of time.

“Hey.” Mariel heard Kai on her right. A slow song had just started, for once. Mariel couldn’t feel her legs much anymore. Kai smiled at her.

“Hi back.” Mariel, feeling reckless for some reason propped her arms up onto Kai’s shoulders.

“Oh, I see you.” Kai’s voice was raspy as she laughed. Mariel felt Kai rest her hands on Mariel’s waist.

As they swayed to the music, Mariel realized she was slightly taller than Kai and pulled her in a little closer. Kai smelled like dry cleaned clothes with cinnamon - maybe. Mariel couldn’t be sure. She hummed along to the song under her breath, barely hearing it herself. Sometime in the middle of the song Kai dropped her head to rest on Mariel’s chest. Mariel wrapped her arms around Kai and could just rest her chin gently above Kai’s head. Their bodies were in parallel with each other, left and right, left and right.

When the song ended Mariel didn’t want to move. She kept her hands pressed into Kai’s back and hummed the tune slightly louder so Kai could hear it. Kai sighed and pulled away after a minute or two.

She tucked her hair behind her ears. It curved slightly forwards and Mariel melted a little when Kai glanced up again. The music was starting up again, an upbeat overplayed pop song. Mariel held out her hand and fell into a little curtsey.

"Care to join me for drinks m'lady?" She was looking down, but if she had been looking Mariel could imagine seeing Kai smile. She felt Kai gently place her hand in Mariel's and latch their fingers together. Mariel pulled Kai to the punch bowl. It would be useless trying to find their old cups, after all.

There was almost nothing left in the bowl. Mariel poured a cup of the mixture into a cup and handed it to Kai. Kai took a big gulp and handed it back to Mariel. Mariel sipped from the same cup. Just as sweet and bitter as before.

"Y'know," Kai started to remark. Her voice was raspier, but matter of fact, something that startled Mariel a bit. Kai slowly took the cup from Mariel. "In Japan, drinking from the same cup where someone's lips have touched is like kissing."

Kai locked eyes with Mariel and took a slow, long sip.

"Oh," Mariel didn't know what to say. So had they kissed? But they didn't. But - well, Mariel's brain had stopped working well. And the drink wasn't helping. She was transfixed by Kai anyway, with her eyes flashing and the radiation of electric energy coming off her. "I didn't know that."

When Kai gave her another look, Mariel simply said, "I don't know what to say."

"My gosh, Mariel." Kai set down the cup as if out of patience and crossed her arms. "Then don't."

Kai leaned forwards and pushed her lips gently against Mariel's. Mariel didn't do any more talking.

When she was a little girl, she had nothing to worry about. When she became a teenager, it was all about the boys. When she turned 15, she was kicked out and forced to live in different places. Tessa was about to move all her items out of her mom’s house when she got a call. Asher Bell had been trying to call her all day, and every time she would decline, he would call again. She picked it up and he said something about the park at her college then hung up. Tessa had been in her bunny pajamas all day and decided that she couldn’t leave like that. She pulled her barely long enough hair into her neon-blue hair tie. After looking at shirt after shirt, Tessa settled on her depressing blue V-neck t. she’d also found an old pair of black leggings so she could wear her black sandals. A few pieces had already fallen out of the loose ponytail. They curved around her pale lightly freckled face and almost made it into her light grey-blue eyes. She was on her way to the college when she heard a noise. It was loud and ear-splitting, but she kept going. Tessa walked over to the door of Asher’s dorm and knocked quietly. 

“Hello?” She said. 

“Who is it?” A voice yelled back, but it wasn’t Asher’s. 

“Um... never mind. Wrong room.” Tessa walked away in confusion. 

She called Asher to see where he was, but he didn’t pick up. She texted him asking what was going on. He still didn’t answer.  

“HEY,” a voice yelled from behind her. “Why did you call me? I’ve been at your dorm for like an hour.” Tessa whipped around in fear.  

“Asher!” She jumped, “You could’ve answered my text dude. I was scared.” 

She walked up to him to playfully hit his arm. He gave a fake whine and winked at her to let her know that she did absolutely nothing to him. Asher almost always wore a t-shirt and jeans. That night, he wore a light grey shirt with his distressed jeans that he’d been sitting in for three years. Tessa could tell he had just woken up a little before his calls. Mostly because of his disarranged hair that slightly covered his face. Under the light, she could’ve sworn that his hair was a dark brown, with some faded streaks of black from middle school. Asher’s Levi’s had been worn to pieces but were still in operation. In the dim moonlight, his skin was a dark olive tone, and his strong hazel eyes sparkled as he gazed upon Tessa's soft figure in front of him. Tessa and Asher weren’t mean to each other, but they did have some heated arguments. Asher always picked on Tessa, saying that she liked him and that she was too scared to say it. She would always tell him that she didn’t and that if she ever dated him then god would’ve taken all the good ones. She did like him though, and secretly, she was telling him. Asher had a best friend that we can call Sam. She did everything with Asher and was the only person who knew about his little crush on Tessa and her crush on him. She didn’t let either know, namely because she didn’t want their friendship to change. 

Sam and Tessa hated each other the year before, but now they had become good friends. Tessa trusted her with everything and had even told her about something that only she knew. That’s what really made the deal between them. Not even Asher could change that. Asher looked at Tessa for a solid two minutes before he asked, 

“Whatcha thinking about?” 

“Nothing.” Tessa replied, “Just thinking about Sam.” 

“Yea, I miss her too.” He looked down gliding his foot on the ground. 

“I wonder how she’s doing down there,” Tessa’s face had gone from almost no emotion to wonder, fear, and sadness all in one movement to make a slight frown. 

“I can promise you that she misses you just as much as you to her.” Asher half smiled at her as to apply sympathy. 

He put his arm around her shoulders, and she put hers around him as they walked to the bench in front of the school. They sat in silence for what seemed like forever. Tessa glanced at Asher to see if he was looking at her, unsurprisingly, he was. He was looking, smiling, just being his goofy self. She loved him as a brother, and even though he thought he shouldn’t, he loved her in a different way. Tessa didn’t know it and he didn’t want her to. Everything was finally going right in his world. He had planned on telling her tonight, but he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t tell her that he had a crush on her, that he was the guy she needed, and that she was perfect in his eyes.  

It was almost three in the morning when they started home, and Asher insisted on walking Tessa to her door. Tessa was about to tell Asher good night when he kissed her out of nowhere. Tessa just stood there in shock as Asher told her goodnight all awkwardly and walked back down the few steps to leave. 

It had been almost a week since the kiss and neither Tessa nor Asher had said anything about it. They were on their way home from school when Asher finally broke the silence. 

“I’m sorry.” 

“It’s okay.” Tessa just looked down at the floor. 

“Should we tell Sam?” 

“That’s not really my concern right now,” she said. 

What they didn’t know was, Sam was back, and she wanted to surprise them. Sam waited near the stop that Asher and Tessa said that they usually got dropped off and waited until she saw the white public bus. She stood behind a tree giggling to herself. Asher got off the bus after Tessa and as they started down the street, Sam lightly followed behind. They were talking about going down to Florida to see Sam on spring break. She was about to jump into the conversation when she heard Tessa ask Asher who he liked. Asher had never told Sam, so she stayed back to know his answer. Not surprisingly, he said no one. She put an arm around Asher’s shoulder along with Tessa’s and spoke loud and clear just to shock them. 

“I like someone.” 

“Sam! We’ve missed you some much!” Asher hugged her with a huge smile on his face. 

“I need to talk to you about so much that’s happened. I’ve missed my best friend.” Tessa hugged Sam as hard as she could to make up for all the lost ones.  

“I’ve missed you guys too,” She said with her strawberry blonde hair swaying in the breeze. Her loose, red, summer dress hung off her hips with the seam ending just at her mid-knee. The light cherry blossoms looked as though they really swayed with the bright fabric. Sam’s red toenails peeked out from under her strapped sandals. Her light peach skin was darkened from the tan she’d developed, and her freckles had gotten more noticeable. The fact that her blue braces had disappeared in the past while had made it harder to ignore her beauty in the sunlight. Sam’s light rose lips stretched when she smiled at her friends. Just walking near them had made her ocean eyes bluer and more carefree. Her cheeks had been blushed lightly from the sun and the dimples that were only the slightest seeable formed in the first conversations of the year with her chosen family. 

Sam walked with them to Asher’s house where they used to hang out after school. Sam told them all about Florida and how amazing her school was. Asher and Tessa kept looking at each other wondering if they should tell her about the kiss. After Sam stopped talking, Tessa put her hand on Sam’s and looked at her as she was about to cry.  

“What? Tessa, what’s wrong?” Sam asked. 

“Um. Asher and I kind of kiss.” Tessa looked at her feet and then back at Sam. “I’m sorry.” 

“Why are you saying sorry? It’s your choice to do what you want.” Sam smiled. 

“We don’t know. We just weren't sure how’d you react.” Asher said. 

Sam was about to tell them that she was coming out of the closet and that she liked a girl when Tessa pulled everyone in for a group hug. Tessa let go and asked Sam who she liked, Sam was about to say Jag, a girl she met in Florida, but was scared. Instead, she told them that she hadn’t found anyone cool yet. They looked at her suspiciously, but let it go. Sam kept saying in the back of her mind, ‘I need to tell them about her, I just have to.’ Asher was about to go tell Sam bye when suddenly, he felt a tug at his shirt sleeve. 

“Are you gonna tell me bye or not?” Tessa softly said with a wink. 

“I didn’t know that leaving yet,” He said back. 

“Okay lovebirds, knock it off until I’m at least a mile away,” Sam jumped in. 

“We’re not lovebirds. We kissed a small little kiss.” Tessa rolled her eyes at Sam. 

“Whatever,” Sam said back. 

Asher looked a little disappointed, but he didn’t say anything. He didn’t want to be rejected or made fun of, so he just smiled and pretended to listen.  

It had been a few days since Sam came back, and it was almost time for Sam’s plane to leave. Tessa asked if she could pull Sam to the side. They walked off a little way away, and Tessa looked Sam in the eyes. 

“I have nowhere to live. Do you know any places that are cheap in Florida?” She asked as she pulled out a plane ticket. 

“Oh my gosh! Tessa are you coming to Florida with me!?” Sam said with extreme happiness.  

“Not just me.” She pointed to Asher who was holding his ticket up for Sam. 

“You guys!” Sam looked back and forth as Asher walked over to join them. 

“We want to make sure that you’re okay with it,” Asher said. 

“I’ve got a place, but Tessa can’t find a cheap one.” Asher elbowed Tessa jokingly. 

“Come stay with me. I’m lonely in my apartment.” Sam held Tessa’s hands hoping she’d say yes. 

“Yes. I would love to stay with my best girl.” Tessa hugged Sam. 

“Plane 142, plane 142 is leaving in ten minutes.” A voice came over the loudspeaker, 

Asher, Sam, and Tessa all held hands till the last second upon getting off the plane. Asher and Tessa looked around in amazement.  

“It’s beautiful here.” Tessa looked at Sam. 

“It’s nice, but we all have stuff to do so I say that we all go to our living spaces and unpack.” Asher Said. 

“Meet at the beach in let's say two hours?” Sam shrugged. 

“Deal” Asher replied. 

They walked in different directions when all this sudden, Asher turned around and hugged them both. 

“I’m sorry.” He stepped away to give them space. 

“What are you sorry about?” Tessa looked in his eyes.  

“Asher don’t,” Sam wouldn’t look at Tessa. 

“What.” she said, “What is she talking about Asher?”  

“I have to tell her.” He said almost in tears. 

“Tessa,” he grabbed her hand. “I’m so sorry that I lied to you.” 

“Lied about what? When?” She was starting to get angry. 

“I told you that you liked me and that you were just too scared to say it.” he had a few small tears running down his face. “I like you. I was the one who was scared and I’m so sorry that I didn’t tell you and that I kept it for so long.” 

“Asher. It’s okay.” Tessa put her bag down and gently put her now free hand on his cheek to wipe away the tears. She then whipped around to Sam. “Sam. You knew?” she spoke in a hurt way.   

“No. That’s not what I thought he was going to say.” She was just as confused as Tessa. 

“What were you telling him not to do?” Tessa questioned. 

“I’ll tell her,” Asher said. 

“No, it’s okay. I'll tell her.” Sam turned full forward to Tessa. “I need to tell you something and you can’t freak out,” she said. Tessa nodded. “I don’t actually live here. I live in a little place with a crappy roof and a freaking straw door.” She said ashamed, “I didn’t want you to think that I was a loser for not living with my parents.”  

“Why would I ever think that?” Tessa hugged Sam and held her hands on her shoulders. “I think that living on a beach would be fun.” She said with a wink. 

Asher just kinda watched for a minute but decided that he had to join them. After their hug had departed, Sam put an arm around Tessa and Tessa did the same. They’d agreed to meet at the West end of the beach near Sam’s hut. Asher was the first to turn around, but before he started walking, Tessa gave him one more brief hug and walked away. 

Sam and Tessa were on their way to the beach when they heard an earsplitting scream. A girl was being beaten by a man in all dark clothes. Sam had recognized that scream. She heard it in while walking by a drama class almost a week earlier. Jag, Sam’s secret crush was in the corner of an ally, trying to shield herself from the abuse. Before thinking, Sam dropped her bag and pushed the man out of the way. She knelt in front of Jag and embraced her. Tessa, being the supporting friend she is, followed Sam into the ally of pain. A split second before she reached the two women, the man busted her arm with the small bat in his hand, forcing her to the ground. She was so close to them but couldn’t keep them from the strikes that were thrown at them.  

Sirens! Sirens screamed as blue and red lights flashed down the street. The man stopped abruptly and ran down the ally. It was too little too late for him though. The cop commanded the man to put his hands up. Blinded by the lights, all three girls couldn’t see who was put into the backseat, but to honest, I don’t think they cared at that point. 

“Are you okay?” Tessa asked with her hand on her hurting side.  

“I’m okay, Are you?” Sam responded looking at Jag. 

“I guess I’m alright,” she weakly said. 

The officers then questioned them and asked if they were going to need medical assistance. They all answered with no and started walking down the street. Tessa stared talking with Jag, asking her what all happened, and who she was. Sam was on the outside of the conversation, but she still listened to make sure nothing to open was said. It was about midnight when Tessa and Sam made it to where they were meeting Asher. He was still waiting at the boardwalk just looking down at the swaying waters.  

“Hey.” Tessa yelled, “pretty boy.” 

Asher turned around in surprise to see another girl with them. He was starting to think he was delusional.  

“Hey.” He waved at the girls. “Who is this?” He asked. 

“I’m Jag,” she slightly moved her hand.  

“Nice to meet you Jag,” Asher put out a hand for her to high five but dropped it back down.  

“So, sorry we're late. We had a little bit of a setback.” Sam said. 

“Yea. A three-hour setback.” Asher crossed his arms. 

“We had to change and get to know Jag a little.” Tessa protested. 

“Sorry that I made you late. You shouldn’t have helped me.” Jag cut in. 

“What do you mean helped?” Asher asked. 

“Tessa and Sam helped me in an alleyway some ways back,” Jag explained the whole situation. Asher swept all three girls into a hug and held them there a minute. 

“Okay. You can leg go now; you’re sort of hurting our bruises.” Sam warned him.  

Asher let loose and Tessa sighed a breath of relief. They all walked down the beach with each other and were on their way to get some ice cream for the wounded ladies. The ice cream shop was closed due to how late it was. Asher and Sam went to look for a place for everyone to get food while Tessa and Jag waited at the storefront. Sam was worried some about Jag accidentally saying something, but she chose to ignore it. It had been a few minutes of Tessa and Jag talking when Jag said something about Sam not liking anyone, and made Tessa think about how she said that there was a guy at her school.  

“Sam said that she liked a guy in her school,” Tessa said confused. 

“She’s not into guys,” Jag said even more confused. “She’s on the other side of the water.” 

“She never said anything,” Tessa said. 

“Oh. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything.” Jag apologized and tried to grin a little. 

“No. You’re fine, don’t be sorry,” Tessa said with a faint smile. 

As Tessa finished her sentence, Asher and Sam came back with a plastic bag with “Ben’s Burger’s” written on it in big letters.  

“Hey,” Sam waved. 

“Yea. Hey.” Tessa stood from the ground and crossed her arms at Sam. 

“What?” She said. “What did I do?” 

“Well. I thought you liked “guys”.” She smirked. 

“Oh.” 

“Yea, care to explain?” 

“Tess,” 

“No.” 

“Tess, please let me explain.” 

“You could’ve explained if you would’ve told us. I gotta go.” 

“Where are you going?” 

“I don’t know yet. I have to find a place to live.” 

“Tess please.” 

Tessa didn’t let Sam finish her sentence before turning to the beach and walking away. She didn’t look back and she didn’t want to. She walked and walked, thinking about what Sam thought would happen if she had told her. 

Tessa had been walking for miles, and all she found was more beach. It seemed to go on forever in her mind, but she knew it would end and she’d have to stop walking. The sun was starting to rise and gave what felt like a golden streak of warmth over her body. Tessa’s clothes were dirty, and her sneakers had filled with sand. She knew that at some point she’d have to go back and get her stuff. Her hair was oily, her eyes were tired, and she felt like her brain cells were dying slowly by the minute. Tessa was hungry, tired, aching, and she missed her best friend. It was about noon when she decided to tell Sam that she was sorry and try to repair some of the friendship that she’d built up little by little. 

“Ring,” Tessa picked up on the first ring, hoping it was Sam. It wasn’t.  

“Have you seen Sam?” Asher’s voice was panicked like he’d just run a marathon. 

“No. Why?”  

“She’s missing.” He spoke hard and flustered at the same time. 

“What do you mean she’s missing? It’s been a while since I saw her, but she couldn’t have gone far.” 

“I’ve been looking ever since she ran off crying.” 

“She was crying? I didn’t mean to, I’m sorry. This is all my fault.” 

“No, it’s not.” 

“Yes, it is, I was the last person to talk to her.” 

“It’s okay, but if we're going to find her, we have to do it now before she does something.” 

“Okay. Where are you?” 

“I’m a little past the pier on the left side looking near her place. Where are you?” 

“I’m around the end of the beach on the right. I’ll look around the town a little and you look around stores, dark hid outs, anything you can find.” 

“Okay. I gotta go. Bye” 

“B-” The line ended. Asher didn’t even let her finish, she wondered what was going on but didn’t worry about that too much. She had to find Sam. 

It had been a few hours since Asher’s call and still no luck. Jag hadn’t been heard from since the blowout, but Tessa had the slightest feeling that she might have some information.  

“Hello?” A muffled voice answered. 

“Jag? Is that you?” 

“No. It’s Sam. Tessa?” 

“Oh my god, Sam. Asher and I Have been looking for you for hours. Where are you?” 

“I’m with Jag and Asher near the place where we had our moment.” Sam’s voice still sounded confused and covered. “Why are you talking about looking for me?” 

“Asher called and told me that no one had seen you since last night.” 

“Oh. I guess he was playing a trick or something but we're all at Jag’s mom’s restaurant.” 

“Ugh. Okay.” 

“If you’re not still mad, I'd like to apologize.” 

“I wasn’t mad. I just was really hurt that you couldn’t tell your friends.” Tessa sniffed at the thought of almost losing her best friend. “You shouldn’t be sorry. I was the one out of line and I'm sorry.” 

“It’s not your fault that you reacted like every other human being.” 

“Can we just go back to no secrets?” 

“As long as I can pick on you for liking Asher.” Sam laughed. 

“Deal.” Tessa joined in. “Where did you say you were?” 

“Well I was just at the restaurant, but were leaving to go to the rocks on the south side of the beach if you want to meet us there.” 

“Sounds good.” 

“Alright. Bye.” 

“Bye.” 

Sam grinned at the thought of getting her best friend back. She knew that it wasn’t going to be the same, but that after gaining trust back, they’d get close. She gathered her things and headed towards the beach with Jag and Asher. On their way, Jag saw Tessa and they joined each other. The sun was just about to set as they sat at the rocks, talking, laughing, and listening to the crashing waves. Tessa and Sam sat together in between Jag and Asher. They all had their arms around each other and heads on shoulders as everyone fell asleep. The next day, Tessa woke up Asher so that they could walk down the beach some before Jag and Sam noticed. They had the two girls leaned in one another. Asher had pulled a small heart-shaped locket out of his left back pocket with a picture of her and him together.  

“I got one for Jag and Sam as well.” He winked while pushing his free hand through his tangled hair. 

“Oh yes, they’d be so jealous if only I had one.” Tessa smiled. 

“A lots happened in the past week, you never know.” 

“That is very true. I don’t think they even have a picture together do they?” 

“I got one of them last night in front of the sunset.”  

“You really planned everything didn’t you,” Tessa stopped walking for a moment. “Do you think that they’ll end up together?” 

“They might.” Asher wrapped his fingers in hers. “Does it matter?” 

“I guess not. I’m just used to it being the three of us.” 

“It’ll be weird anyway. Might as well add something else to the pile.” 

“I guess that’s true. Do you think that it’ll be weird between you and me?” 

“No doubt about it.” Asher looked playfully at Tessa, “Want to see who’s faster?” 

“It’s obviously me.” Tessa let go of his grip and sped off. 

“That’s not fair, you got a head start!” Asher yelled as he ran after her. 

“You think you’re faster, so prove it.” Just after they stopped in the sand, out of breath, Tessa’s phone went off. 

“Sam.” The pair said followed by a chuckle from the synced words. 

“Hey. Where are you guys?” Sam sounded tired and still half asleep. 

“Asher and I went for a walk while you guys slept.” Tessa’s voice was scattered by her lack of air. 

“Oh. Well, Jag and I are going to get breakfast. Why are you out of breath?” 

“If you wait a minute we can join. We had a race.” 

“Nah, that’s okay. We can get you something if you want though.” She sounded excited but too lazy to fully express it. “Did you win?” 

“You know I did.” Tessa dramatized her voice as to tease. “Were good, thanks.” 

“Okay. You’re on speaker phone if you want to say anything to Jag.”  

“So are you.” Tessa, still exasperated, commented. “Hi, Jag. Don’t let Sam get coffee or else she’s all yours.”  

“Alright.” Jag giggled. “I won’t.” 

“Hey, Asher. Get your arm off Tessa’s shoulder.” Sam joked. 

“How did you know that?” He moved his arm immediately. 

“I was guessing.” Sam laughed. 

“Alright. You and Jag go get breakfast, and Asher and I will meet you back at the rock in a few.” Tessa ended the joke. 

“Okay. Have fun, and if I have any extra pancakes, I’ll give them to you.” Sam replied. 

“Got it.” Tessa grinned. “See you guys later, bye.”  

“See you later, bye” Sam hung up almost as she said the words.  

“We’ve got time if you want to get breakfast too.” Asher intertwined his fingers in hers. 

“Sure. We can only get it if I can pick the place though.” Tessa smiled up at him. 

“I’ll take that deal.” Asher and Tessa started walking back down the beach towards the sidewalk. They got breakfast and texted Sam and to let them know that they were going back to the rocks. Sam and Jag had finished a few minutes before and were on their way near they’re two friends. When the friends met back at the rocks, Jag fully introduced herself as Jaylynn Amber Grey. Jag for short. She had been friends with Sam since the beginning of her year at the school. She also explained that she and Sam started dating about a week ago when she told Sam that she didn’t like guys. That was why Sam was so cheerful on the way to the airport. Everyone got her phone number so they could all keep in touch after Asher and Tessa went back to West Virginia.  

Asher called the school that he and Tessa went to say that they wouldn’t be there for a few days. The trio had become a quartet in a matter of a few days. It could be for the better, or for the worse. They didn’t care about what might happen later in the future. All they wanted was to spend the last warm days they had with Sam and Jag in the sun.  

Sam and Jag are still together to this day and Tessa Is still in love with Asher. Forever is a long time, but when you have someone to spend it with, forever is just another word for time. Asher, Tessa, Sam, and Jag are still good friends, but I have a feeling that something might change in the next while.

Look into my window,

You'll see me, just a girl.

Blended in a universe,

Of strawberry and cherry swirl.

Marshmallows will make it sweeter,

but not as sweet as her touch.

Knowing we're made just the same,

is why I love it so much.

I can't deny the feeling,

I can't close my eyes to the hate.

But I enjoy being who I am,

Haters, please disintegrate!

In her, I find a friend, a lover, and I know,

With her, my hungry heart

will always have a place to go.