If I followed my own advice

I'd be a success overnight.

Quit my job, and just write

About the time I decided to take flight.

In my advice,

I detail what it's like to give

Every burden and fight to Jesus Christ.

And I'd be better wirh my cash.

Instead of having the mindset of

I can't take it with me to the end

So I may as well spend.

Or use the excuse that I get tired of

Being paid just to turn around and have to

Get these bills paid....Broke again....

Making transactions, shaking Satan's hand

Until God decides it's the right timing

For a blessing. Damn.

Now I'm paying back insterest on a loan

That I can't afford....

Praying please get me out of another

Impossible situation, Dear Lord.

But that doesn't take away from who I am.

I want you to have more self-worth

Because I was told that other guy was the better

Man and still in love I stand.

And I would know that God has devised a plan.

If I took my own advice,

I'd know how special I am, right?

Believe in myself with some consistency.

Instead, one day I'm like fuck it,

And I put down my pen.

The next day, I'm back at it again.

It's easier to give advice because

I don't want the next person to be

As stupid as I.

With eyes looking from the outside

Everything that you have ever known

Becomes a lie.

So I can't take my own advice.

I can only pray that I become a little more wise.

#Three #WeAreUrijah

Not for likes or dislikes or

To call anybody out on anything.

Just a lonely bird caged up that

Have a few songs to sing.

Open up and embrace all the pain

That the world brings.

Deceit dresses neatly in the heat of battle.

The road less taken is where I do my travels.

To ensure that I am not judged by the same gavel.

Tattles make the tails of the snake rattle.

Stuck up creek without a paddle.

Make the cross stable and prepare

For my crucifixion.

Look at the world today.

What was Jesus really fixing?

Giving us more chances than we deserve.

Put the swerve on the wheels in the storm.

Through the struggles a warrior was born.

Born alone..die alone..

Keep the saddle on for the journey we are thrown, I'm gone.

But at the same time things get more clear.

My mind isn't all here, but I'm more than ever

The man my foes should fear.

Enemies are necessary like friends are.

My life is just a trip without a car.

From my hometown and back around.

I'm no hero.

I only wanna be the difference between

What they are doing and what

God mapped out to me. Be free.

As the days end, another page in the Bible

Turns, but for better days I yearn.

Clouded by yesterday's rain.

I need a prayer or two just to keep me sane.

On days like today when I wake

And I can't find an escape

From the things in my mind that plague.

Got some news the other day

Sort of messed up my day.

And still to this day

I am dealing with heartbreak

Alone that she left me here to face.

So a smile on my face is a nice

Change of pace.

It's really my way of coping and pretending

That I am okay.

Of course I made my mistakes,

But how much longer do I have

To suffer? As this pain grows bigger

Like a never-ending earthquake.

Sorry, I can't be there for you on this day.

On this day I have lost all focus, all hope.

Maybe later, I will figure out this slope.

They are giving me the rope,

But hell isn't kind so I must decline.

Unmotivated...

Indoctrinated,

But still my resume isn't up to

Their standards.

Silence is so loud when you're in purgatory.

Give God the glory

Even in times like this because at least

I have a finish line to look forward to.

I know nobody listens but,

I still cry out.

Maybe tomorrow, I'll be able

To shut the noise out.

Explain the matrix that

I've been caught in.

A moth to the fire

So I'm gone with the wind.

Let's pretend I have it all

Under control and

Having a grip on reality

Wasn't just an illusion.

Peace is eluding me.

Get closer to God....

Is what I tell myself.

Chasing after love,

It's forbidden.

No, she chose another.

Through bed cuddles

And love letters,

Hides the pain of the past.

Frontlined wars and wrote

Out the victim's names

In blood in bold letters

All scars are shown,

I'm naked to you now.

But you don't care.

Damn, I'm dumb for believing

Otherwise. Took me awhile to

Realize I was the prize,

But I have come to realize

I miss my stepdaughter,

She was my pride.

But fuck love, I don't have time

To be sprung now.

Grandma's cancer is in stage

And it's rapidly spreading.

It's Paw Paw all over again now.

This is wild.

Chasing after a woman,

Meanwhile everything around me

Is falling apart.

Dearly departed.

Can you compartmentalize these

Emotions, they are flowing,

But on the surface I show very

Little. Staple a S to my chest

In hopes that would make me

Stronger than what I am.

At least put up a facade because

It's someone out here doing even worst

Than me.

My life isn't mine anymore.

Don't take offense to it.

I'm just being honest you see.....

#WeAreUrijah

Replace my rifle with an arrow

From Cupid's quiver.

The dream is all lucid.

Here you are, a shining star.

On par with the myths, angels,

And a unicorn in human form.

Beautiful art on the perfect canvas,

Handcrafted by God's touch,

Using His paintbrush that is forged

Out of the feathers that are tethered together

To make up Gabriel's wings.

A calming voice, four trumpets melodic

While the angels sing.

I have captured lightning in a bottle.

You are every prayer answered,

You are too good for any mortal.

I hear destiny calling so I answer

On the first ring on one knee.

Will you marry me?

I hope you liked the wordplay. Get it?

My destiny is that proposal.

Yea, you get it.

Now take this ring as a token

Of my love and appreciation.

Of all the times you have stuck by me

When I wasn't deserving of it.

I will keep pushing for success.

God first and I cannot fail.

In love with your allure.

You can be sure.

I have two keys of an equation.

That's me plus you in case we need to reassure.

I'm just telling a fan's story on FanStory.

Some people find it interesting,

Others find my skill lacking.

Got me questioning myself like

Maybe I can't hack it.

Let me repackage and pack it up.

Cause a little more racket.

You can't silence me.

I've spent too many quiet years

Trying to find my voice.

I just turned 30 last year

And I'm just now finding my pace.

Let's cut to the chase.

If they like me, it's because I'm authentic,

And the way I think, makes these words move

Gracefully and fitted like they're doing calisthenics.

They tried to count me out,

But I'm not finished, not even halfway done.

Don't take me too seriously, I'm just having fun.

From puns to sentences that run from the subject

Of me trying to prove myself to be

Something of a pundit.

Yawn at the thought of defeat.

Pawn my patience to pay my bills.

Short-term solutions creating long-term issues.

That's what comes when you're

Looking for instant gratification.

Talking to the discredited, discarded, dispirited

Denizens of the demimonde.

I made it alive so now when I touch back

I'm looked at as a Demigod.

Only for critics to say,

I'ma big fish in a small pond.

"So you're really nothing special, son."

Whether I have one dollar or a million,

You will always know me as just Moine.

I'd tell you gets easier,

But I'd be lying to you.

What I can say is that problems

Come and go.

There's a God bigger than the struggles.

You may think nobody cares

Or even listens.

Just remember, before you

Think about taking your life,

You will be missed.

You'll ruin the lives of others

Because you're loved and appreciated.

You'll have the evil ones

Sent to destroy you.

That's their only purpose.

I saw that little one killed herself

Over being bullied. No place for it.

No baby girl, don't you leap

From that bridge.....I'm sorry......

Sorry that you felt so defeated and alone.

I hope they sing songs of the tortured innocence.

It's raining right now.

Those are cries from the skies.

It's never supposed to be this way.

Someone does care.

Life takes you to the edge.

We have to resist the urge to jump.

Clear skies sure to follow

The thunderstorms by the morning.

Chin up, soldier. #WeAreUrijah

When I was imploding from the pain.

Putting up jump shots out in the rain,

Without even a single dime or nickel to my name.

Too proud to beg for change, prayer considered lame.

It's heartbreaking when they say they got you,

But they're selling you dreams.

I used to get dizzy spells, hearing sirens ring.

The voice of an angel, telling me my name.

Telling me like Shad you're going to be a great man.

Transitioning from the struggles of losing a great man(grandpa).

Crossing dudes over left and right, knocking down threes.

I didn't believe it then, man I was struggling.

Fighting with myself, trying to convince myself that I'm deserving.

Trying to find the meaning of life in the wrong things.

Til' the OG's pulled me to the side and informed me.

You either build or destroy, where you come from?

Jackson, neighborhood Presidential.

I see no ending to this trap. Hmm.

It's quite amazing that you write like you do

And that you shine like you grew up in a shrine in Peru.

Revelations book, blessed if you read it through.

Devil fighter, also known as Urijah.

I make them demons hit their knees and say to our Father.

Cut out distractions.

I'll keep you updated on the true and living.

Shout out to the good-hearted, broken people.

Never give up even when your faith is missing.

While ya'll debating who's the truth as far as like politicians,

I was at Heaven's gates, rewiting the Ten with perfected penmanship.

Your block, my block, their block.

Save them!

The media, drug dealing, cop killing, child shot!

I stand against the tyranny and devise a plan.

That's why the people got my back like the insurance man.

I'm bringing ancient mathematics back to modern man

By giving change to the less fortunate to ride the tran.

It's cold and dangerous in this land,

So for survival, you have to kill and hand out

That raw food to lions disguised as lambs.

And let them know that you can't kill a spirit with a gun

So we come through by the millions.

Our light is brilliant.

If I had a voice, I would sing.

Shout from the mountain tops to every living thing,

That we are truly art and made in the image of God.

On days, I've felt like a fraud and couldn't carry your word,

I drop to my knees and ask you to spare the rod.

I want better for myself, but I can't seem to be heard.

If I had a voice, I would talk.

Talk about the times you were there when I was trapped in a mind vault.

Every single moment I wake up and I feel as though I am stuck.

In a rut, thinking I should really just die because this can't be life.

When I didn't know how I would pay rent, there you were saving me again.

So many loved ones turned their backs on me, along with the world.

At times I felt like I wasn't worthy of love, worthy of trust. You assured me

That it was something greater for me later. I must endure.

Pistol on my lap contemplating.

I'm aching, my heart is racing and I feel like I can't take it.

I just want to prove to my family that I can make it.

Appeal to a younger generation that we can all be successful if we all follow the Savior.

I'm nothing without you Father and I shall continue to take the path you set and burn my regrets.

In a vortex, chasing validation from others that I never seem to get.

I hope that you can help me see things clear and remove all things not pleasing to the Heavens.

Peace, love, wisdom, and patience.

I should put my efforts into these things and establish a core.

Without them, my love life is a chore. Putting my energy into people

Who clearly have no time to adorn. I won't even the score.

I've already won. I claim victory in your name Dear Lord.

Next time I'm feeling down and unimportant, I pray that you come a little closer

To hear my voice.

Although I may look the ordinary, I bring with me an army.

If you want untapped potential, check the mortuary.

The richest place on earth is the cemetery. What could have been?

Now we'll never know because of silly differences and petty arguments

That could have been resolved, but we get foolish when gold and pride are involved.

Deep lessons transpire in the chair;

The barbershop, or the electric, your choice is yours at the end of the day.

I'll give you some advice, you must be a little eccentric.

If you think there's never a wrong path to take,

I guess it makes it ok as long as you lay down in the bed you've made.

Blaming God for the choices we humans all make, instead of standing firm with Urijah

Against the devil for Pete's sake. When I die, none of you are invited to the wake.

I make this look easier than the level of skill it really takes. You can keep your guns and your vest.

My flex is being better than the next in whatever I decide to do next.

That's why when you look down my resume, you don't have to interview me.

Check his name. The search is done-we got him, he's the best.

You thought this S on my chest stood for Shad?

Nah..

I'm in tune with the spiritual. Brain power on 100, Damn near supernatural...