being unseen

then

being seen

what once was

impossible

becomes

possible

lift a hand to the sky

and thank life

for

bringing you joy

being broken

oh so broken

then

realizing it's a lie

and

you've been here the

whole time

it's a whole

new

way of living,

when you're free

even in the

dark

i can spread

rainbow paint

with the toes

of my tennis shoes

it's unseen

but

i can see

Crib empty.

Lovers distant.

Baby departed.

#LaFausseCouche (c) 6 Sept., 2021.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=iFx-5PGLgb4

Smile girl 

He says smile girl 

He says pretty girls smile with their mouth wide 

So I smile 

With my talons 

Showing 

Just in case 

He’s tries to 

Bite the monster out of me 

Let him know I am A wolf 

I will howl 

Until the whole neighborhood hears me 

I got blood on my teeth from smiling so wide 

Pulling back my jaw 

Doing as I am told 

You know what happens 

To pretty girls 

Who don't smile 

At midnight men 

They end up disappearing 

In the middle of the night 

I just need to go home 

So I give him a smile

“ He says pretty girls smile with their mouth wide “ 

But inside I feel so ugly 

I wonder how many teeth he has collected from the girls who didnt  smile back at him 

it’s as if my soul already knew

before me

as my heart gazed around it all in wonder

at the quiet magnificence

of you and me

These burdens I carry,

From the ignorance before me

They say you pay

For your father’s sins

& he bit off much,

But chewed none

I am the retch

And my growth,

The vomit

Steering through

Venomous genes

Only now,

I draw conclusions

In the powder

Of this broken home

It’s the hindsight

That lights the truth

The butterfly,

Affected

So we bathe

In what we’ve taught ourselves

And have hope

That one day

The rain will wash it all away

Xiii| dOn’T LisTeN tO TheM

97; each whisper lingers in your h e a r t

v! doubting the faith, hope, dreams drilled into it

-48) each word breaks r e l a t i o n s h i p s

P. until you crumple in a quiet corner and cry with only ThEm to accompany you

66! each wail cripples your h e a r i n g

m. they ring in your ears and are all you can hear

Vi) DoN’T tALk aBOuT tHEm

74. each whisper sends h e a d s turning

N! mouths twisted in sneers, noses crinkled, eyes squinted in repulsion

-21. each word prompts another offer for h e l p

C; thrown pity like fallen petals, plucked from the rose of sympathy

16| each wail plasters another l a b e l

q. ripping your heart slowly, agonizingly piece by piece

xi; DOn’t tHinK AbOUt THem

32. each whisper h a u n t s you

t) in your dreams, in your memories, in your happiness, in you

89. each word stabs your s a n i t y

Y! absorbing it secretly through cool, metal blades

-50| each wail guides you to the e d g e

r. teetering back and forth aNd bACk anD FoRTh ANd baCK aND fORtH AnD bACK AND FORTH AND BACK AND FORTH AND BACK AND FORTH

IV. dON’t iGNorE tHeM

B) each whirl becomes u s e l e s s

3! sentenced to an escape-less, endless mental torture

Do you ever notice

how I change

when

you enter rooms

and when

you leave?

Saw the colors in me

When I turned off the light

Knew who I really wanted to be

A smile on my face they want to write

They are not a part of our community

But they understand our daily struggles

They have a mature and open mentality

Making us see life in better angles

Some people are not just friends

They are a part of your familly

In your relationships you see no ends

Enjoying moments, living life happily

Sometimes we get rejected

Many people turning us their backs

They'll make you feel protected

Going with you on the same track

They'll push you to the top

When your familly is taking you down

From your eyes no more tears will drop

On your head they'll put a rainbow crown

And when life gets brighter

They'll celebrate your victory

All of you were the fighters

The reason behind this glory

I am a

f

a

l

l

i

n

g

//*dying*//

star

(but I will go out as a supernova)