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Crayonshinchan
55 Posts • 55 Followers • 96 Following
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Challenge
Perspectives
From anything besides humans
Daphne_H

Selfish, Sweaty Human

Why are you squeezing me so hard?! You always squeeze me too hard. And you swizz me around too fast, sloshing my insides all over the place until I am positively ill with it. And then when I can't do anymore, you shake me up and down until I am vomiting blue spots everywhere. Yet, you have the audacity to blame ME!

You really are rude and inconsiderate. I do everything for you. I make sure all of your important forms are filled out. It isn't my fault that YOU are always late with them, or forget to use black ink - another stupid human rule if you ask me (not that you ever do). I help you keep in touch with your friends, although why you choose to use that devil machine more than me is baffling. It's much too quick. Where has the anticipation gone?

But most of all, I give you an outlet, a connection between what is in your heart and the blank page in front of you. But what thanks do I get? Your odious saliva all over my cap end. And that's if I'm lucky. If I'm really unlucky, you give it a good chew. A chew?! The humiliation. And, I won't go into the sweat. I just can't with you anymore.

I suppose I should look forward to the end. The blissful silence of the waste bin when I can no longer muster up any good ink. Of course, you won't think twice about me before opening something shiny and new. Don't think I don't know what you are. You, mine enemy and only friend, are a stationary whore. Yours is the only touch I have ever known yet your head is turned by every fine-liner and calligraphy set with a markdown sticker on it.

That book you have had me slave over? May it never sell a single copy.

Challenge
Advertise something
Make it unexpected
Daphne_H

The All Rounder

Now available:

The perfect excuse to get out of that wedding you've been dreading!

Or is it your own big day? Your dreams are about to come true, but you've packed on a few pounds, don't fret, we are here for you too!

This product is so versatile, especially if you haven't been able to go for a while.

Or maybe the in-laws are in town, and you hate having them around. We've got your back, they won't even have time to unpack!

For your very own slimming, people-repelling, event-avoiding miracle cure, call Al's Chick 'n' Bitz and order any product off the menu. We throw in the Salmonella for FREE!

Food poisoning done right.

Challenge
Describe the life of a pen
Any type of pen can do ;)
ISE

Constant

I was picked up

I was put down

Click

Tap

As I made contact with the paper

It was constant

I was happy.

I rose

I fell

I waited

To be lifted

once again

For I hadn't been used

in a long time.

So I waited,

hanging there, staying there,

expecting there

to be

a change,

but none arrived.

I was misused

Practically thrown away

but somehow I was seen

and so I was wielded once more

by the next person

who happened to pick me back up

Off of the ground.

Sure, I was lost,

but now I was found.

Challenge
Advertise something
Make it unexpected
Profile avatar image for Karoma
Karoma

The New Human organ

Brought to you by FutureHumanKind, the organ makers of of the future, the first artificially grown human pancreas is on the market. Labelled as the cure to diabetes, by some on both the FDA and CMS boards, this lab grown human pancreas is the result of decades of research in human medicine. Reports of this organ being used on patients as been published throughout the last few years, but those have been reports of it during the clinical trials, which lasted for nearly 17 years, and only now is it available for the public. However, due to how long it has been in these trials, as well as to how innovative it is, it comes with a very high price tag. Lucy Adams, one of the first members of the public to recieve it after the clinical trials were over, paid nearly $77,000 for the organ. Despite this high price tag, FutureHumanKind has already ran out of all their pancreases; total of nearly 100,000 of them, but the swedish company already has 300,000 planned to be ready for the beginning of next year, 10 months away.

As with all medical products, there is only a limited supply available, not everyone that wants one will be able to get one of these new pancreases. So per-order yours today. FutureHumanKind also has plans for making other artificial organs in the future like spleens, livers, hearts, and even the lowly appendix. There is even a chance of them making a new human organ.

After recieving this new pancreas, anyone with diabatic issues will have nearly all of they problems resolved. However, once size does not fit all. Ask your doctor today if FutureHumanKind's pancreas is right for you.

Please note that this article is paid for by FutureHumanKind to advertise on its behaf.

Challenge
Advertise something
Make it unexpected
Profile avatar image for RosemarieThorn
RosemarieThorn

Boo

Who

death

disappear

but what

what if

you could get

me

I say

BOO

I say

WHO

no I don't say

HOO

I ask for

YOU

Yes, this is an ad

No I am not alive

I am selling something

no nothing bad

technacly nothing

if you don't have one of those

what are they called?

Spirit boxes!

I say this

cause I must talk

so I can go

BOO

and

WHO

So for just

sending three souls

to eternal torment

you can have a ghostly friend,

who goes

BOO

and WHO

but not

HOO.

Challenge
Perspectives
From anything besides humans
EchoStanback

Confessions of a Persian Rug

I was beautiful once. I remember being beautiful. I was bright and bold, I brought color to their lives.

Then they began to use me. I was exposed to the world and the ones who were supposed to love and care for me began to put me down and once I was down they kicked me and kept kicking until I felt I would never stand tall again.

What could I do but lie there and take it?

They would walk all over me without even looking down. They would walk over me without thought, without even knowing I was there. I might as well have been part of the furniture.

I sit back and wonder why must they walk all over me? I guess you might say because I allow it. I do suppose it was my fault for laying there so long.

Why did I accept this mistreatment you ask? Maybe I got used to laying there, maybe I got used to them walking over me. You can get used to anything if you take it long enough. You might say I should get up and leave if I don't like it but don't you know that I can't?

Challenge
In 15 words, capture a recurring moment in your life.
Happy, sad, funny, mundane, frightening. Anything goes.
Profile avatar image for rlove327
rlove327 in Stream of Consciousness

“I’m bad at writing, Mr. Love.”

"You can think. Writing's just a set of skills you can learn, one by one."

Challenge
Perspectives
From anything besides humans
feverdream

Covid Personified

I just wanted to be with you

wanted to be apart of your history

but not like this,

God not like this!

I understand what I've done,

but I can't take full responsibility,

you control my path,

not me,

as you like to think

you can blame me all you want,

but all I did was show you your faults

your struggle to enforce and change

all I did was make your eyes notice them

the cracks I mean

I can't say I have only shown your eyes that though

think about your life before me

oh, how much you humans take for granted,

all until it is taken away in a mere months

I've taught you lessons that you would have never learned otherwise

so tell me why you hate me?

what is it that makes

Challenge
Perspectives
From anything besides humans
janesnow

I can not believe what happened last night. We were told no creature other than us would walk this island. It looks like we have company.

Challenge
Eugenics
Lets delve into the really hairy topics shall we? Or do you prefer your topics smooth? Is it acceptable to select? Fiction or non-fiction, poetry or prose, scientific detachment or moral revulsion. All opinions welcome.
Miranda23 in Philosophy

A Hairy Decision

Toupee signals stress.

A Beard means business.

Goatees showcase villains.

Mustaches are outta fashion.

Baldness?